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WISH LIST

★ my dark au kink:
+ being captured by the first order and subjected to reconditioning
+ trying to turn him back with the power of gay love and friendship (and possibly failing)
+ he was always a first order tie fighter pilot instead of winter soldiered
+ poe and finn first order murder squad (dynamics if they were both stormtroopers? running away together?)
+ ^ part b: the fam that gets captured and reconditioned together… stays…together…
+ Interesting Dynamics with kylo and hux from dark aus

★ finn stuff
+ what will they do after the war? romantic vacations? homesteading? sending finn's spit to space 23andme?
+ infinite escape reimagining/aus, stormpilot escape room reigning champions

★ rey stuff
+ relationship of convenience because they're both In Denial
+ sith princess rey aus where he tries to save her and/or she turns him

★ kylo stuff
+ infinite interrogating/torture room reimagining/aus
+ ^ part b: stockholm syndrome?
+ We Need to Talk about Leia

★ general
+ honestly anything regarding leia (esp processing grief post-tros)
+ talking about his sketchy spice runner past (possibly playing things taking place during that time in his life?)
+ ^ same for things taking place during academy/new republic tbh
+ i love aus. modern aus, vampire aus, a/b/o aus, let's au the entire world
+ i prefer m/m for poe but am good with most ships

kinks if ya nasty

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[ it’s a mission-cation, all he ever wanted / mission-cation, had to get away 🎶

poe is really happy finn is on this mission~~-cation~~ with him. did he request finn come with him specifically? maybe. leia didn’t @ him, so nobody else should either.

it’s good to be home, but it’s also good to share it with finn. someone he knows never had a home. well, a home-home. not a home like this, with a gruff-but-warm dad and jungle terrain and abandoned mechanic "experiments" still littered around the family ranch.

the last time he’d been back was a quick trip to pick up his x-wing after his solo journey through the jakku desert. !! maybe he can treat finn to a nice refreshing koyo melon. he’s full of "here is my ~~crush~~ close friend finn here on my home planet I WANT TO SHOW HIM EVERYTHING OMG" feelings, tbh.

anyway: back to current reality. he doesn’t mind finn peering over his shoulder. part of him is like " yes lean in harder daddy" but he’s not going to show it. maybe mostly because he's focusing on making the landing. he gives a humored snort. ]

Yeah? Hopefully this is quick and easy. I know all the people we're talking to. [ a pause, followed by ] This is where I live. Uh, lived. It's my dad's ranch. … He's still there.

[ nailed it ]

Edited 2019-08-29 16:33 (UTC)

I can smell him, too.

[ he may have pulled away momentarily, but he doesn't move when she re-enters his space. it's good, his omega side concedes.

he starts taking off his shirt, half because he can pick up that his alpha wants it gone, and half because he wants it gone. she's right; it still smells like hux.

and maybe it's not just that. he wants it off because being here alone with her is making him a little hot under the collar. and if he's lucky, maybe part of the cleansing himself of hux's scent process will involve….. the knot???? his thirsty omega insides can hope. ]

We'll have to fix that. [ It's not so much a suggestion as a promise, falling quietly from her lips as her gaze slides over him. While no other injuries or aches were mentioned she still feels the need to check for herself. Also, there's a part of her pleased by how she didn't have to say exactly what she wanted, how he seemed to just know. Part of their bond, she suspects; being attuned to each other, at least to an extent.

Kylo shifts closer and she bends her head to scent along his now-bare shoulder toward his neck. Removing the shirt removed much of the unwelcome smell but she can still pick up on it a little, that twinge of wrong, and with it the knowledge that another alpha touched what was hers. Tried to take what's hers. The thought leads to another unhappy sound and her hand moves to rest on Poe's arm as she nuzzles the side of his neck. ]

You're mine— [ Her lips brush against his scent gland as she speaks. ] —and I won't let anyone take you from me.

[ there are no other injuries to be found — just some normal cuts and scrapes that come with being an active soldier. ]

Good.

[ it's a muttered response that quickly melts away when she starts nuzzling in on his scent gland. it's an instant calm-making button that makes all his insides turn to liquid. as much as he wanted to fight, it was okay. he didn't need to fight. it's okay, because brianna is here to protect him. brianna? kylo ren? alpha. ]

Thank you.

[ his brain went offline for a minute there, but it turns back on to say more words. maybe — they feel a little bit outside of himself. he's still trying to ease into her being right. shucking off the hard and sticky shell built up around his emotions. a small shudder escapes him. she's so close, why won't she bite down??? (it doesn't matter anymore; what's done was done after the first time.) ]

[ one bullet grazes him, but that’s all it takes to bring him down. (it was a rough graze. it’s a graze in the sense that it didn’t become lodged.) he’s taken out of his trajectory, reduced to a growling, hissing mess on the ground.

but even with the sharp pain and dampness, the sticky smell of blood on his fur, he still wants to fight. maul kylo ren. tear out his throat. so he still lurches forward unsteadily, all the more angry and feral for his injury.

he wasn’t going to be taken prisoner again. death would be preferable (especially because lucking out and escaping again felt like lightning, unlikely to strike twice.) ]

[ Part of her — perhaps the small rational part unaffected by hormones and instincts — rarely felt certain of how Poe would react to her closeness. It's fair, really, considering their short history from before; considering who they are and what they've individually done in their lives. But perhaps on some level that contributes to how protective she is of him. Aside from her own desperate need for something, someone. For contact that isn't fighting, for affection, for being wanted as something other than a tool or weapon in someone else's arsenal.

She's never felt this before, and it's exhilarating in a way similar to some of her forays in using the Force. It probably should frighten or concern her, as she now has a living, breathing weakness. Instead she only wants more. Of everything.

That shudder draws her in and her other hand slides up his chest as she moves forward, not content to simply be close but walking them back until they meet a wall. With nowhere else to go she presses her body against his, gently pinning him against the wall, and she nips at his neck, tongue immediately chasing after to soothe. His scent is intoxicating, even when every ounce of his presence isn't calling out for her. The need she's picking up on doesn't hurt though.

As her teeth graze the soft skin, starting to worry a fresh mark on his neck, both her hands roam over his torso, following the lines of his muscles and drifting down to slide over his hips. ]

[ muscle memory panics when he’s pinned against the wall, but it’s quickly silenced by the newfound reassurance he has that she would never hurt him. she’s his mate, she’s here to protect him. obviously. part of him still feels like a bird trapped in a cage, cut off from his causes and unable to fly. but was this really so bad in exchange? it was becoming progressively harder to say.

he sucks in air like he has to actively remind his lungs to do it. he does his best to offer more of his neck to her; the attention is so good that he would be content to stay in this holding pattern forever.

would be, but they’re close and alone with the opportunity for more.

this time when he wants more, he’s not sure if it’s a rising heat, omega hormones in general, or just… him. it’s hard to really care when the rest of him is getting hard. ]

[ She catches a brief hint of... something, a slight shift that has her subconsciously making a soothing sound, teeth drawing back so she can nuzzle affectionately at his neck. Whatever happened before, it's not now. And now she would never harm him, not even if she were upset with him. She might lash out at things but things were easily replaced, people were not. A mate could never be replaced.

And yet she had left him unprotected, because she didn't assume the worst might happen in her absence. She could have prevented it. She should have.

Her hands, which had started to move up his sides, instead trail back down, lingering at his hips a moment before continuing, and a moment later she's grabbing his thighs to lift him and shifting her own body closer to rock her hips against his. There's something strangely erotic to her about feeling his growing arousal against hers despite clothing in the way, or perhaps because of it. Clothes would all be gone soon enough, of course they would because she she needs to wash away any traces of wrong with her own scent, however right in this moment it's the closeness that registers as more important.

The nuzzling at his neck stops as she lifts her head to rub her cheek against his, then turns her head to kiss him, slow and searing until they both need to breathe. She sucks on his lower lip and her hips press into his, more than a little hint of what's to come. While she can only smell Poe now, that doesn't change her need to re-stake her claim, or to make sure the only other thing she can smell on him is herself. ]

[ poe dameron is smooth like skippy, but clary fray is just cranky. the peanut butter jelly dance off will have to wait at least twenty-four hours. ]

No. [ her right hand wraps a little more snugly around the staff, and clary rears back to slam it against the crook of the dummy's neck. a power move. the dummy wobbles, clearly hurt, but eventually rights itself. it's equally annoying and convenient all at once. ] Because you said Abby, and we don't even know an Abby, so why would your phone autocorrect to the name of some girl we don't even know?

[ logic!!! ]

You’re a fool.

( this is hardly a revelation. nobody that had done what poe had done — and continued to do with such a startling amount of regularity — could be considered entirely sane.

he might be tempted to admire it, that stubbornness, if only for the way it’s made so many of the order twitch. hux, especially, had wanted the honor of dragging poe back to the nest. perhaps he should have allowed it. that way he'd be down an additional headache and still have a clip of ammunition to spare.

instead, they're stuck outside, squaring off in broad daylight. a thrilling sort of business even without the risk of exposure. )

You know I can't let you leave.

[ it doesn’t really matter that he can’t respond verbally, because the response would have been the one he’s giving now: a snarl. just with words.

the pain radiating through him made it progressively harder to maintain wolf form. using anger as fuel was perhaps not as effective as he wanted it to be. it’d be great if he’d start healing right about now, but surviving totaling a car has him in low battery mode.

so he puts all his energy into a very last ditch effort to jump kylo and sink his teeth in. this, somehow, still felt like a preferable option to running.

it’s true: he is a crazy fool. mama didn't raise a quitter but she did raise a homosexual and an idiot. ]

Edited 2019-09-07 08:05 (UTC)

[ a whine starts to rise up his throat when she stops attending to his neck, but it’s immediately quelled by the kiss. the kiss which is overwhelmingly good, leaving him breathless in its wake. he’s perfectly eager to rock his hips against hers, eager for the friction. he trusts that more will follow, because —

no. oh no. the math seemed to line up? as far as he could tell; he wasn’t exactly keeping a calendar. but maybe it was heat time again. maybe the shock to his system from hux’s assault followed by kylo’s anticipated (anticipated?) return triggered it early.

it was either that or she was genuinely arousing him on a completely normal day. and although that small stubborn sliver of himself refused to come to terms with the idea, maybe it wasn’t that bad.

after all, monsters were less scary when they were your monster. and she was going to tear hux apart for even coming near him. tearing hux apart because of him. something about envisioning that was so insanely appealing that a wave of slick gushes out of him. in that moment, he's left staring agape, pupils wide. ]

[ Her hands encourage his legs to wrap around her and she keeps a grip on his thighs to support him, even if it's not entirely needed with the way her body's pressing against his. She could use the Force too but it's more satisfying for her to touch him.

As his arousal increases her nose twitches slightly, picking up on the scent, and it makes her harder, continuing to move her hips against his. If she had any doubts about whether he wanted her near — wanted her, period — the way his body's responding leaves no doubt.

She licks at his mouth, arching her back to try and press her body closer to his. There's an increasing desire for skin against skin, for nothing at all between them. A desire more easily accommodated elsewhere. Not that it isn't tempting to fuck him right here against the wall. But a wall was far from comfortable and if she wanted to get rough there were far more pleasurable ways to do it, especially when she knows her mate has been through a lot this day.

So rather than start to rid them both of clothing Kylo curls an arm around him for better support as she steps back from the wall. She's not used to carrying anyone like this but it hardly matters, there's no struggle or difficulty in her movement, her pace easy and steady as she takes them to the bedroom. Her mouth has gone back to his neck, sucking at the new mark she's made. It's deeply satisfying, seeing any mark she's made on his skin, and probably only the first of the night at that.

It's only once they're on the bed that she lifts her head again from his neck, brushing her lips along his jaw, licking at the corner of his mouth before raising her head entirely to look at him. Her eyes are dark but with desire, the way she gazes at him heated and hungry. Running her hands along the waist of his pants, she carefully untangles from him so she can unfasten his pants, shifting to stand at the end of the bed as she tugs them off, clearly expecting little resistance from him. ]

[ It almost makes her moan, all the pain and anguish she can sense from him. His emotions are a delicious cocktail — one she wants to make even stronger. She'll have to be careful not to push too far but she has enough self-control for that, at least at this point in her torture session.

Kylo hones in on the storm of pain and emotion in his mind, picking through his thoughts. Of particular interest to her are the fears that have come to the surface. Fear was a strong tool for manipulating a person, in so many ways. A surefire path to breaking a person as well. Which, while she didn't want to break Poe's mind, she wasn't opposed to creating a few more cracks in his defenses. Some fresh trauma to use to manipulate him later if or when she needs it.

The small blade is tucked in her belt for the moment to free up that hand so she doesn't have to lower the other and risk breaking the connection she has with his mind. Stepping in a little closer, she presses two fingers into the start of the wound's path low on his spine and focuses her power on making him believe it's the blade again, wanting to make him believe she's digging it in, really damaging his spine.

If he's terrified at the thought of being incapacitated, she wants to see just how much fear the illusion of being partially paralyzed will cause. ]

[ the clarification doesn't hurt. everyone else finn's encountered lately hasn't had that kind of a parent status situation. they've all been dead, or unknown to them, or like... murdered by them... star wars, please stop.

unless bb-8 counts. since bb-8's dad is alive and well and a cool person.

it's nice to be in on a poe landing that doesn't end with crashing. he's only had their first one for reference before now. ]

And that's all good, right? No warrants out on you that you forgot about?

[ he doesn't sound like he actually thinks they might have to pvp poe's father and/or home. it's not that he wouldn't fight his friends' dads or literal home turf for them. or that that wouldn't line up with the vibe of the whole star wars universe. poe just sounds pretty chill and fond about this, which is nice, after everything.

this is the new most interesting place to check out of finn's life so far. rip to canto bight, but poe dameron the origin story is different. ]

[ he’s still screaming, deep in the depths of his suffering when suddenly

there’s a lack of pain. a lack of any feeling in his lower body at all. he may not be a doctor or medical droid, but he has enough basic understanding of the human body to know why this may be so.

the paralysis was scarier than the incapacitating injuries she gave his legs, scarier than the taser — but then, with the taser he knew it would be temporary. (his logical braincell would have reminded him that she would probably send him to be patched up anyway, but he was too consumed by pain and fear to listen.)

if it was real, really happening, then he had no true way to escape. he wouldn't be able to move, not well. no chance of escape, no flying out. (well, maybe if he could actually make it into a cockpit, he'd be fine. but that was the problem.) and that's the tack most of his thoughts take. fear of vulnerability and helplessness. ]

[ Yes yes, definitely don't listen to that little voice of logic that might spoil her fun at the moment. Although should he manage to discover or push past the illusions, find his way to a bit of clarity, she'd be impressed.

Kylo draws her hand away from his back once she senses the shift in his fear, the action having served its purpose. Wiping a bit of blood off on her pants, she steps in closer, lightly touching his side. ]

Is something wrong, Poe?

[ Her tone is almost taunting, a smirk on her lips she feels no need to hide. She lets her hand skim along his side, the movement pointed as the path takes her over his waist and hip, testing the illusion. ] Perhaps I should help you get more comfortable...

You know what's wrong. [ he snarls it out, feeling like a cornered animal more than anything. his eyes follow her hand down, a wave of nausea going through him with the disconnect between seeing her touch and the absence of feeling. it was almost like being tased — almost. ]

And I think you did enough.

[ he tries to move away from her, an action that takes all of his upper body strength and is made awkward by his restraints. it's not much more than a jerky swivel, but he tried. ]

Nope. Maybe a bunch of people who're still mad about all the noise I made. [ which he's clearly not worried about as he laughs. he makes an attempt to clarify with — ]

You know, I was always trying to take off somewhere. Getting into things. [ burning up force trees. ] There's still some of my projects, you can see 'em out there. [ all those assorted buckets of bolts... maybe kes kept them as lawn decor. maybe he knows if he moved them, poe would complain for that one week a year when he comes to visit. ]

[ he sounds... genuinely cheerful? in a different way than the exhilaration that comes with doing a battle real good. he's happy to be reunited with the concept of a simpler time. :'( ]

[ She laughs, an openly dark, malicious yet delighted sound, as he tries to get away from her in whatever way he can. It amuses her — and it also tells her quite clearly that she hasn't pushed too far (yet, at least) since the defiance that seems such a cornerstone of his personality is still alive and well. ]

Oh, but there's still so much more I could do. You haven't gotten to see the depths of my creativity yet.

[ Creativity, depravity... same difference.

With the way he's reacting to her at the moment Kylo feels satisfied with the illusion and lowers her hand, careful not to touch him with that one. Not that she really thinks he has enough rationality at the moment to make the connection that she might be toying with his mind, but being a little careful doesn't hurt. Besides, his mind has given her plenty to work with right now. There would be no fun if she dug everything out all at once.

She gives Poe a temporary reprieve from her closeness as she steps away to walk over to the table, setting aside both her lightsaber and the small blade. Best not to play too much with either, lest she burn anything that might prove more difficult to heal back to 100%. Traditional knife wounds were far easier and reliable to mend, both with medicine and other methods of healing.

When she returns to where he is there's a blade of several inches tucked in her belt. She doesn't pull it out right away, instead one hand goes to the back of his head to forcefully tilt his head forward a little bit, the fingers of her other hand almost delicately stroking the back of his neck. ]

Perhaps I should dig the blade in up here, hmm? [ She taunts him, tapping a finger against the top of his spine, near to where the wound along his back ends. ] Then there would really be no more running away. You would be entirely reliant on me. How does that sound, Poe?

[ in that moment, poe feels the true meaning of the phrase "it could always be worse." that. that would be worse. the stroking the back of his neck makes him feel nauseous. it's — no, stabbing wouldn't be preferable, he's quick to correct himself. but it's unenjoyable. part of the same family of unenjoyable feelings.

he cranes his neck back to get a better look at her. he's still trying to be brave, but there's a definite undercurrent of frantic anxiety in his expression and his words. ]

Sounds awfully boring for you. Thought you liked it when I put up a fight.

[ Tempting as it is to hold him in place, she drops her hands as he moves his head, tilting her own to the side as she takes in the expression on his face. Not much bravado visible now, but she has to give him a little credit for marginally holding it together. Even if she has a hunch that it's more for his own sake than hers at this point. ]

And here I thought you were eager to die. Shouldn't you want me to become bored of you? Then again, if I grow bored of you I wouldn't have to kill you. I'm sure there's a market for used slaves. Some creatures like toys that are already broken.

[ As she talks one of her hands idly runs along an uninjured portion of his back, the contact because she wants to but also a little because she's sure he doesn't. ]

Mmm, I have to give it to you, though, you're right. I do enjoy you putting up a fight. I enjoy it in so many ways.

[ on his own terms. he wanted to die on his own terms. not like some kind of pin cushion. and just like that, he finds something new to be horrified of. would the devil he knew be better or worse than the devil he didn't?

that is when it occurs to him, as he's working through all his pain to think: ]

Can't put up much of a fight when you've got me broken like this.

[ instead of thinking of it as a fear, maybe he can reframe it as... a plea for her to not mutilate him any further. ]

Not a physical fight, no. [ She'll agree that much, but only that much, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of being fully correct in his assessment. Truly, that is the line she has to be concerned with when it comes to him, more than any other. The balance between too much fight and defiance, and none.

Fully broken things do tend to lose her interest quickly once they reach that point. She still has too many ideas — uses — for him to want to get him to that point already. ]

Remember what I said earlier about screaming yourself hoarse?

[ With that she pulls the blade from her belt, lightly tapping the flat of it against her other hand as she moves to stand beside him. ] There's still plenty of you that can feel pain. Still a few places I'm sure you value... [ She shifts her gaze from his face to follow the blade as she trails the edge of it along one of his arms, making her way toward his hand. ]

[ he doesn’t want to scream, just on principle. it would be giving her satisfaction that she doesn’t deserve. he’s worn out, full-blown trauma fatigue. horrified yet exhausted.

so when she starts moving the knife towards his hand, he’s quick to comment with ]

Didn’t you do this already? The hand thing?

[ she wouldn't leave him permanently injured. probably. he thinks. it hadn't been her style thus far, anyway. ]

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