[ yeah, he's taking his time in solitary really well. (he's not taking it really well.) the fact that he actually made progress with kylo and then biffed it with one smart-ass remark plays on loop in his mind. of all the stupid things he's ever done. what was that?
after all that wallowing, he spent one split-second being … excited wasn't the right word. maybe a little excited to see something besides the inside of his cell? that feeling immediately dissipates when he realizes that's it's not kylo dragging him out for more reminiscing about her (their?) mother, but hux taking him to interogation. his entire body stiffens with dread before they're even there. he remembers the way down the hall. he remembers the room. he knows what's going to happen next, blow by blow.
he doesn't know if he can handle it again.
regardless of whether or not he knows, it's happening. the familiar sensation of the probe at his temples. a nice refreshing round of electric shock, complete with blacking out and thrashing against the frame of the rack. his jaw already feels stiff and sore. how much time had it been? it could have been a minute or an hour for all he knows. it's all the same.
his vision swims and comes to focus on kylo. kylo here, about to choke out hux? hopefully? he tries to help the process along, because he's a helper.
he offers, loudly:] I can think of more words for him if you need help.
and then i took forever to reply like a jerk 💀
after all that wallowing, he spent one split-second being … excited wasn't the right word. maybe a little excited to see something besides the inside of his cell? that feeling immediately dissipates when he realizes that's it's not kylo dragging him out for more reminiscing about her (their?) mother, but hux taking him to interogation. his entire body stiffens with dread before they're even there. he remembers the way down the hall. he remembers the room. he knows what's going to happen next, blow by blow.
he doesn't know if he can handle it again.
regardless of whether or not he knows, it's happening. the familiar sensation of the probe at his temples. a nice refreshing round of electric shock, complete with blacking out and thrashing against the frame of the rack. his jaw already feels stiff and sore. how much time had it been? it could have been a minute or an hour for all he knows. it's all the same.
his vision swims and comes to focus on kylo. kylo here, about to choke out hux? hopefully? he tries to help the process along, because he's a helper.
he offers, loudly:] I can think of more words for him if you need help.