[ there's no way to deny that he got off, which just adds kindling to his angry fire. if his body responded to what was happening like that, did that mean ... he wanted it??? ? ? no, that couldn't be right. it wasn't. he doesn't look away from her, his expression fixed in his displeasure. he doesn't move his face away, either, although that's mostly because he still isn't able to.
maybe she was wrong about that, but it didn't mean she was wrong about everything else. lines. a sensation of cold washes over him. he'd already drawn lines. had them crossed. created a whole spectrum of what was endurable and what wasn't. physical torture was fine, being coerced into sex was Not Great but still better than being brainwashed. he should not have a spectrum like that!!! and yet, he did. does.
his mouth is quick to clamp shut when she leans in, and continues staying shut even when she pulls away. just in case. never too careful.
there's a slow, almost five percent of a sensation coming back to his body, and it's nauseating to think that the first returning sensation he feels is her hand in his hair. ]
Don't.
[ it's funny how the protests progress from no/stop/you won't to "don't." the fact that he's switched to playing this card actually makes him want to throw up in his mouth. but he knows the odds. he can't keep stubbornly denying and protesting. he couldn't fight against her and win. not really, not without some kind of miracle. and if she was going to do whatever she wanted for him, and he truly had no say in the matter ... maybe he could at least have some control over whether or not everyone he cared about had to watch it. ]
no subject
maybe she was wrong about that, but it didn't mean she was wrong about everything else. lines. a sensation of cold washes over him. he'd already drawn lines. had them crossed. created a whole spectrum of what was endurable and what wasn't. physical torture was fine, being coerced into sex was Not Great but still better than being brainwashed. he should not have a spectrum like that!!! and yet, he did. does.
his mouth is quick to clamp shut when she leans in, and continues staying shut even when she pulls away. just in case. never too careful.
there's a slow, almost five percent of a sensation coming back to his body, and it's nauseating to think that the first returning sensation he feels is her hand in his hair. ]
Don't.
[ it's funny how the protests progress from no/stop/you won't to "don't." the fact that he's switched to playing this card actually makes him want to throw up in his mouth. but he knows the odds. he can't keep stubbornly denying and protesting. he couldn't fight against her and win. not really, not without some kind of miracle. and if she was going to do whatever she wanted for him, and he truly had no say in the matter ... maybe he could at least have some control over whether or not everyone he cared about had to watch it. ]