[ Kylo rolls her eyes as she hears him speak, and if she were in better spirits she would have pointed out that 'make me' do anything was a dangerous wording choice when dealing with a force user. Oh yes, she's sure he actually wants to know. It's just a distraction. Delaying the inevitable. There's a part of her certain of that, the same part that thinks she herself is delaying for some unknown reason, and that she should stop wasting her valuable time and dig into his mind. The past however many hours wouldn't have happened (probably) if she'd followed through on her intent already.
She turns to look at him, almost like she might do just that. Should do that. It's not as if he actually cares. He doesn't care. No one does.
But what she actually does is reply. ]
Well it certainly wasn't this. [ She gestures widely as she turns to fully face him, as if to indicate everything and not so much the immediate surroundings. The ship, what it represents, everything. ] Why would anyone want this, outside of dictators and fascists?
[ She chuckles bitterly, shaking her head a little. ] I suppose the funny thing is my mother tried to help me stay out of politics. When she turned down the governorship of Birren it wasn't simply because she had little interest in it, but also because I would have inherited it and she knew I had no interest in all of that. And yet here I am, with far more than that in my hands.
[ The melancholy that had surfaced the last time they spoke in-depth is present again, as much due to what she says as due to the path of her thoughts as she considers all that led to this. A life that, for most of it, felt out of her control.
What did she want, really? What did she want? Not what someone else wanted, demanded, insisted. But what she wanted, in the truest part of herself. Did she even have a real answer to that anymore? ]
Once, all I wanted was to be like my father.
[ The words are offered quietly, carefully measured as if she were trying to keep emotion out of her voice. Would such an admission surprise Poe, she wonders. The dark voice at the back of her mind is already chiding her for revealing a weakness. But she's tired, physically and mentally, and even if he's merely engaging the conversation to try and delay her doing something to him, Kylo — Brianna — indulges it because she wants to. Because the illusion of someone giving a damn is as close as she ever gets to the real thing. ]
this is a wonderful surprise ❤
She turns to look at him, almost like she might do just that. Should do that. It's not as if he actually cares. He doesn't care. No one does.
But what she actually does is reply. ]
Well it certainly wasn't this. [ She gestures widely as she turns to fully face him, as if to indicate everything and not so much the immediate surroundings. The ship, what it represents, everything. ] Why would anyone want this, outside of dictators and fascists?
[ She chuckles bitterly, shaking her head a little. ] I suppose the funny thing is my mother tried to help me stay out of politics. When she turned down the governorship of Birren it wasn't simply because she had little interest in it, but also because I would have inherited it and she knew I had no interest in all of that. And yet here I am, with far more than that in my hands.
[ The melancholy that had surfaced the last time they spoke in-depth is present again, as much due to what she says as due to the path of her thoughts as she considers all that led to this. A life that, for most of it, felt out of her control.
What did she want, really? What did she want? Not what someone else wanted, demanded, insisted. But what she wanted, in the truest part of herself. Did she even have a real answer to that anymore? ]
Once, all I wanted was to be like my father.
[ The words are offered quietly, carefully measured as if she were trying to keep emotion out of her voice. Would such an admission surprise Poe, she wonders. The dark voice at the back of her mind is already chiding her for revealing a weakness. But she's tired, physically and mentally, and even if he's merely engaging the conversation to try and delay her doing something to him, Kylo — Brianna — indulges it because she wants to. Because the illusion of someone giving a damn is as close as she ever gets to the real thing. ]