[he chuckles under his breath, like, what was your first clue, surely it wasn't one singular person showing up just Trying His Best.]

Yeah, I shouldn't have. The Resistance is in a tight spot right now. The general was worried about sending too many people in to have them not come back for just one person. And yeah, I mean, that's the short of it, you saved me first, but ... [now he has to stop and think about it. now that he's not constantly in motion, he's forced to really consider what all this means. how much finn lost, how much he lost. and it hurts; it makes him feel cold and empty inside and it's just easier to direct his energy towards raging at the first order for doing what they did in the first place but

that kind of rage is exhausting. he's spent on it, and the cold settles in.]

But ... you're the most important person to me, Finn. You're the best, most amazing person I ever met. You're so good, even if you can't remember, I know ... I know you're still good.

[he wants to say more, but stops himself short. it hurts too much.]