[i mean ... it's not wrong. welcome to the sadness montage.
now that he's lost his Purpose, poe is free to spend some time lying in the shitty bed in the bare bones of a ship he found and think about all the ways his life has gone terribly wrong.
and without finn around being a liability in about 30 different ways, he knows he could probably hitch a ride back to ... well, not to the newest resistance base, that would be stupid, but back to yavin 4 to pick up his mom's a-wing and then go back that way.
or maybe not go back to the resistance at all. still. there's an undeniable appeal to just going home. the benefit of being a star wars protag with one living parent is knowing you can go home and have someone to say "hey dad i'm going to go cry in my room for the next week, if you could keep loving me unconditionally and maybe leave food outside my door sometimes that'd be great" to. he's really liking the idea of that plan. that sounds like the best plan.
but part of him wanted to believe that finn would come back. he was still clinging to the ghost of something long gone. negotiating with himself. how long would he wait "just in case"? a few days? a week? forever?
there wasn't a good answer to that question. he keeps putting it off for "later." a tried and true depression move. he leaves like, once, to get food and maybe a few basic supplies like a spanner and some space tape, just in case finn comes back and he actually does have to put this ship together. it's very depression run in a hoodie and pajama pants to get skittles at the gas station because you've lost all your dignity, except he doesn't have a hoodie and pajama pants. but he has been wearing the same outfit for multiple days, i guess. he even left bb-8 in the ship just in case finn came back while he was gone. so he'd come back to something and know he was still there.
he's really bad at giving up, even when he's trying to give up.
that's what you missed on glee. lots of wallowing. he has never felt so directionless in his life. what do normal people do when there are no simple problems that can be solved simply by blowing things up? probably not lay in bed staring into the abyss, but here we are.]
no subject
now that he's lost his Purpose, poe is free to spend some time lying in the shitty bed in the bare bones of a ship he found and think about all the ways his life has gone terribly wrong.
and without finn around being a liability in about 30 different ways, he knows he could probably hitch a ride back to ... well, not to the newest resistance base, that would be stupid, but back to yavin 4 to pick up his mom's a-wing and then go back that way.
or maybe not go back to the resistance at all. still. there's an undeniable appeal to just going home. the benefit of being a star wars protag with one living parent is knowing you can go home and have someone to say "hey dad i'm going to go cry in my room for the next week, if you could keep loving me unconditionally and maybe leave food outside my door sometimes that'd be great" to. he's really liking the idea of that plan. that sounds like the best plan.
but part of him wanted to believe that finn would come back. he was still clinging to the ghost of something long gone. negotiating with himself. how long would he wait "just in case"? a few days? a week? forever?
there wasn't a good answer to that question. he keeps putting it off for "later." a tried and true depression move. he leaves like, once, to get food and maybe a few basic supplies like a spanner and some space tape, just in case finn comes back and he actually does have to put this ship together. it's very depression run in a hoodie and pajama pants to get skittles at the gas station because you've lost all your dignity, except he doesn't have a hoodie and pajama pants. but he has been wearing the same outfit for multiple days, i guess. he even left bb-8 in the ship just in case finn came back while he was gone. so he'd come back to something and know he was still there.
he's really bad at giving up, even when he's trying to give up.
that's what you missed on glee. lots of wallowing. he has never felt so directionless in his life. what do normal people do when there are no simple problems that can be solved simply by blowing things up? probably not lay in bed staring into the abyss, but here we are.]