[it's nice that finn is an active participant in the hug. it feels like he's made some progress somewhere, somehow.
where all logic would say to give up, that this isn't really finn, he can't. poe dameron is literally incapable of giving up. even when he was trying to give up he was still holding out on the dl. there's some part of finn still in there somewhere. he's as sure of it as he is of anything. under all the crying and panic attacks there is someone brave and good.
and even if there wasn't, even if there were no hidden layers and it was panic attacks all the way down, different-finn was still a person worth saving. he doesn't know how to get it across to him, because he's tried it in multiple earnest gay, dramatic ways with varying results, but he's not giving up. not going anywhere.]
It's okay. I get it. Why you had to go.
[and ... it is okay. it hurt a lot and sent him into a four-day depression spiral, but he can get it. it was what finn needed, probably. to be given the choice to go back to figure out what he actually wanted. to realize it wasn't what he actually wanted. (like when my indoor cats sneak outside and then hide under the porch crying until someone lets them back in.)]
Thanks for coming back. I was -- I worried about you.
[bb-8 takes the opportunity to beep loudly in the background like "that is a fuckin understatement you were lying in bed crying about how the patch of sunshine on the wall reminded you of finn but ok." if only finn knew binary. maybe someday.
anyway he doesn't know how to deal with the crying besides more hugging. maybe he'll cry a little, too. cryfest 2k18 turrning into a biannual event. or weekly event. or, most realistically, a daily event.]
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where all logic would say to give up, that this isn't really finn, he can't. poe dameron is literally incapable of giving up. even when he was trying to give up he was still holding out on the dl. there's some part of finn still in there somewhere. he's as sure of it as he is of anything. under all the crying and panic attacks there is someone brave and good.
and even if there wasn't, even if there were no hidden layers and it was panic attacks all the way down, different-finn was still a person worth saving. he doesn't know how to get it across to him, because he's tried it in multiple earnest gay, dramatic ways with varying results, but he's not giving up. not going anywhere.]
It's okay. I get it. Why you had to go.
[and ... it is okay. it hurt a lot and sent him into a four-day depression spiral, but he can get it. it was what finn needed, probably. to be given the choice to go back to figure out what he actually wanted. to realize it wasn't what he actually wanted.
(like when my indoor cats sneak outside and then hide under the porch crying until someone lets them back in.)]Thanks for coming back. I was -- I worried about you.
[bb-8 takes the opportunity to beep loudly in the background like "that is a fuckin understatement you were lying in bed crying about how the patch of sunshine on the wall reminded you of finn but ok." if only finn knew binary. maybe someday.
anyway he doesn't know how to deal with the crying besides more hugging. maybe he'll cry a little, too. cryfest 2k18 turrning into a biannual event. or weekly event. or, most realistically, a daily event.]