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WISH LIST
★ my dark au kink:
+ being captured by the first order and subjected to reconditioning
+ trying to turn him back with the power of gay love and friendship (and possibly failing)
+ he was always a first order tie fighter pilot instead of winter soldiered
+ poe and finn first order murder squad (dynamics if they were both stormtroopers? running away together?)
+ ^ part b: the fam that gets captured and reconditioned together… stays…together…
+ Interesting Dynamics with kylo and hux from dark aus
★ finn stuff
+ what will they do after the war? romantic vacations? homesteading? sending finn's spit to space 23andme?
+ infinite escape reimagining/aus, stormpilot escape room reigning champions
★ rey stuff
+ relationship of convenience because they're both In Denial
+ sith princess rey aus where he tries to save her and/or she turns him
★ kylo stuff
+ infinite interrogating/torture room reimagining/aus
+ ^ part b: stockholm syndrome?
+ We Need to Talk about Leia
★ general
+ honestly anything regarding leia (esp processing grief post-tros)
+ talking about his sketchy spice runner past (possibly playing things taking place during that time in his life?)
+ ^ same for things taking place during academy/new republic tbh
+ i love aus. modern aus, vampire aus, a/b/o aus, let's au the entire world
+ i prefer m/m for poe but am good with most ships
kinks if ya nasty
just gonna throw this over here rather than in the 'last words' meme to be worked on at our leisure
[ The battle rages for what feels like forever. They bend but don't break, the front line holds steady, and finally... finally the tide changes. She can feel it in her bones, when the energy shifts and desperation rises in the other side. The fight isn't over but she knows how it will end, which side will stand victorious and watch the other flee. It might not be the last battle but if not such was coming close.
But with desperation came different risks. Cornered animals fought differently than confident ones. People became unpredictable and fearless when certain they were going to die.
Jasmine's in the thick of the fray, having abandoned her sniper's perch once the perimeter threats were taken out and the big guns damaged. She could do more good on the ground than picking the troopers off one by one, particularly once it became trickier to hit a foe without risking a friend. In the distance she can sense the Light and Dark fighting but she's not needed there. The Jedi's skills have grown sharp and Rey can handle Kylo Ren on her own, though Jasmine's fairly certain Finn is somewhere in the vicinity.
Suddenly, in the midst of a squad of stormtroopers, something rips through her like an icy shard right at her heart. The sensation is so strong and sudden it makes her drop to a knee, empty hand going to her chest like she needs to confirm there's not a physical wound there. It takes only a split second for the realization to hit -- ]
No... no no no...
[ Emotion surges within her and she releases it in a blast, a concussive wave of the Force taking out the troopers surrounding her. Before the last one hits the ground she's off and running. Following the thread of familiar energy that's built over weeks and months from conversations and emotions and hope.
That thread leads her around a destroyed transport and she catches a glimpse of his jacket before her eyes lock on the troopers closing in. Her power sends them flying, and her blaster takes out the one trying to get the drop on her from behind the transport. ]
Poe! Oh please, no... [ She's at his side in an instant, dropping to her knees in the dirt and immediately trying to see where he's hurt. Maybe it's not so bad. Maybe that pulse through the Force was just a warning to catch her attention. Oh, Jasmine hopes that's all it was. It's been so long since she's tried to heal she doesn't even know if she can anymore. ]
it's all good! 💜
he wished he'd been right about that.
he never really considered what being hit with a blaster that wasn't set to stun was like, either. being stunned didn't feel great, but there wasn't much to feel before you went unconscious and, again, felt nothing at all.
there wasn't much blood, barely any blood. just a small blackened crater of an entry point in his side — blackened leather hiding a blackened shirt hiding a dampened but mostly cauterized wound. it didn't go clear through him, but maybe it would have felt better if it did. instead, the bolt went deep enough to create a mess of fused bone, muscle, and tissue before dissipating.
it HURTS. a lot. he's on the ground, he wants to scramble to a safer place, away from the fighting, but he can't. he's more busy fighting his own personal battle against going into shock. if he could focus, if he could pull it together for just one second —
suddenly, jasmine's hovering over him. she helps, a little bit. gives him something to focus on. a reason to fight through it. ]
Hey. Hey. [ shakily: ] Look, it's gonna be okay. It's gonna be okay.
[ comforting others tends to be his first urge. ... but he'd never been a very good liar. nothing about him radiates "okay"; his skin is pale and clammy and his breath comes out in shudders. ]
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That's right, you're gonna be okay.
[ She's agreeing because she has to, for both of them. He couldn't not be okay. The Resistance needed him. She needed him.
And then her heart drops to her feet when she finds the wound.
His pain is practically tangible and her eyes sting as she carefully pulls the ruined fabric away to get a better look, unable to keep from cursing under her breath. Sure, it's not a chest shot, but it's nowhere near good. She raises her head and looks around, trying to get a sense for how far they are from somewhere safer. Calling out for a medic seems like a good idea for about half a second; it's doubtful there's one even in earshot.
Swallowing thickly, she looks back down at Poe and lifts a hand to his face. ]
Hang in there, okay? Stay with me, Poe. It's not your time yet... [ It can't be. I won't let it be. ]
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that's what his body was saying, but his mind knew better. he wouldn't wake up, would he? this was it. this was all there was. he had to fight. claw for it. claw to stay awake just a little bit longer.
"you're gonna be okay." no. wrong. on the most base, instinctual level, he knew he wasn't okay. if he didn't know it before, her frightened agreement sealed it for him. continuing to pretend to be okay would just cut short the time he had to say other things. there was so much, too much, a million things he wanted to say to each and every person in his life, but no time. no words.
his eyes lose focus for a moment, but then he's back, gaze settling on her. as much as it can. her touch helps ground him, too. his brain tries to tell his arm to put his hand over her hand, but the motion doesn't make it to reality. ]
You're good. You're still gonna be good without me.
omg it's too early for this ;_;
The way his eyes lose focus, even briefly, hits like a brick and shatters her weak attempt at calm. She's seen that too many times to not know exactly what it means.
She blinks against the tears, gently stroking her thumb across his cheek. ] Don't talk like that. I can't do this without you.
[ He believed in her when no one else did. Saw the light in her that just needed a chance. A spark to help the flame grow. He saw what she couldn't see but eventually he got her to see it too. To believe. To fight the darkness and prove that it didn't have to win.
And damn it, she wasn't going to lose him without a fight.
Mentally shaking herself, she turns her attention back to the wound and covers it with her hands, trying to be gentle with her touch but there really wasn't the time to be delicate and careful. There's no shortage of emotion and energy for her to call on, it's practically coming off her in waves, and she channels her power to her hands. Her touch flares with heat but there's no burn, just warmth and light. She wills that heat to heal, to mend, to follow the pain and draw it out while replacing it with the calm and gentle warmth of the Light.
Her breath catches hard as she feels his pain, it makes her head swim and threatens to break her focus, but she forces herself to push past it. She could do this. For him, she would endure. Maybe it wouldn't be complete but any amount of healing was infinitely better than none and gave him more of a chance. ]
Stay with me, Poe. Fight. I'm not done fighting for you so don't you dare give up.
i know 😭
what if he didn't have to go anywhere? he feels better now — not 100 percent by any means, but focusing is easier. his breathing steadies. ]
I'm trying. But you gotta promise me, okay? You still gotta try.
[ he thinks of things he'd said before. eulogies given over empty coffins. people you lose don't really go away. they stay with you. he couldn't be there, but —
— but he would still be there. in everything. an echo. sparks light the flame. matches light the flame but what happens to them after? maybe he was more of a match. if he really turned jasmine, if she could go forward with rey, if the resistance had both of them — he'd be able to rest knowing he'd done that much. ]
oh look i finally made time to return to this heartbreak
I promise. For you, I'll always try.
[ The words still come out kind of choked but this time it's as much because of her worry and fear over losing him as it is from pain. She's healed herself in the past, in those darker days, and she's healed minor wounds in others, but this? This is far beyond anything she's tried in the past. Some little voice in the back of her mind -- doubt, probably -- scolds that she shouldn't have bothered when she doesn't know what the cost could be.
Except her heart knows there's no cost too great. She still kind of owed him, after all. A life for a life.
Jasmine wishes she could see what progress is being made but she doesn't dare move her hands. She trusts the Force and It knows her intent, and she can feel that a difference is being made. His breathing sounds steadier and his heartbeat feels stronger. If she can at least do enough to get him to safety and to the medics then it'll all be okay.
Her body sways as the pain grows within her but the Force steadies her and she stays focused. Pain is only temporary. Pain can provide strength. No. That voice gets swiftly silenced by the light. She wouldn't turn to that. Not here, not now, not ever again. ]
screeches
this time when he tries to put his hand over hers, his body listens. it's warm. for a second he thinks it's too warm, only to come to the realization that she's warm and he's cold. every simple thought takes all of his focus.
he can't tell her to stop yet because he has more to say. something singular, something important cutting through gray fog. ]
Can you make sure my dad knows? I wanna make sure my dad —
[ i want him to be proud of me. that wouldn't have been the end of the sentence, probably. that would have been too emotionally direct. but that was the intent. ]