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WISH LIST

★ my dark au kink:
+ being captured by the first order and subjected to reconditioning
+ trying to turn him back with the power of gay love and friendship (and possibly failing)
+ he was always a first order tie fighter pilot instead of winter soldiered
+ poe and finn first order murder squad (dynamics if they were both stormtroopers? running away together?)
+ ^ part b: the fam that gets captured and reconditioned together… stays…together…
+ Interesting Dynamics with kylo and hux from dark aus

★ finn stuff
+ what will they do after the war? romantic vacations? homesteading? sending finn's spit to space 23andme?
+ infinite escape reimagining/aus, stormpilot escape room reigning champions

★ rey stuff
+ relationship of convenience because they're both In Denial
+ sith princess rey aus where he tries to save her and/or she turns him

★ kylo stuff
+ infinite interrogating/torture room reimagining/aus
+ ^ part b: stockholm syndrome?
+ We Need to Talk about Leia

★ general
+ honestly anything regarding leia (esp processing grief post-tros)
+ talking about his sketchy spice runner past (possibly playing things taking place during that time in his life?)
+ ^ same for things taking place during academy/new republic tbh
+ i love aus. modern aus, vampire aus, a/b/o aus, let's au the entire world
+ i prefer m/m for poe but am good with most ships

kinks if ya nasty

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Brianna makes another soothing sound at his bark, understanding the discontent and meaning in its tone but not having the words he most likely wants to hear. She could lie to him, she's sure others would. Or tell him that he'll just have to deal with it. Which, yes, he will, but she's trying to calm him after all, not rile him up and have him accidentally hurt himself.

(Oddly enough she's not concerned about him hurting her. She probably should be but it just... doesn't seem like something she needs to worry about at present.)

She bites the inside of her cheek to stop from cracking a smile at the way he pushes against her hand. A few more gentle pets and she settles so she can sit comfortably beside him, combing her fingers through his fur and scratching between his ears. Her own wolf wants to whine, feeling the desire to shift herself, but she knows she wouldn't be any happier about being here than he is (she isn't, but it's easier to deal with in human form). ]

[ at this point in the night, he knows that no matter how hard he whines and bites and scratches, he's not leaving this cell. the only thing left to do is to let brianna comfort him... and actually feel comforted by it, despite initially trying to resist.

maybe he should... take a nap? that mood when you're so bored and there's literally nothing to do besides sleep to make the passage of time go faster: werewolf edition. ]

[ As he seems to settle she relaxes herself a bit, not having been tense exactly but, well, he is an unpredictable element. Hours earlier had they crossed paths elsewhere they would have been at each other's throats, metaphorically speaking, most likely.

And it's entirely possible the next day will be worse. That he'll be aggressive as hell and obstinate and making things worse for himself purposely or unintentionally. Or that some of the others in the pack won't appreciate that their prisoner actually survived the change and survived the night. There's so many questions and unknowns that if she tries to focus on them she'll give herself a headache, aside from stressing herself out.

So she focuses on what she can control. On what's important right now, which is the present.

Brianna stops what she's doing only to move, sitting with her back against the wall. It allows her the best view of their surroundings and should she doze off herself at least she'll stay upright. As she situates herself she lightly pats the ground next to her, making a soft encouraging sound. It doesn't bother her to offer him what comfort she can (feels the least she can do, considering) and if anything it's near instinctual; something attributed to her turning him, she assumes. ]

[ too exhausted to put much (any) thought into the action, he moves next to brianna to curl up next to her and have a sleep.

poe eventually shifts back (when the sun rises, most likely). and he sure is thankful to have been unconscious for the whole ordeal, because before he even opens his eyes his awareness is nothing but pain. there's a soreness that resides deep in his bones; he still feels too hot. every thing is loud and he knows if he opens his eyes it will be too bright so he's just going to keep them closed. (at least it feels more on par with a hangover now.)

there is a whole half-second while he's lying there, not quite awake, that he almost forgets why he hurts. like maybe he did just drink too much the night before... but then the thought is gone. whoosh.

he groans. kind of amazing how far the big bad wolfslayer has fallen. ]

Where...

[ is brianna? ]

[ Once he settles next to her she resumes stroking his fur, reassuring the wolf and doing what she can to soothe him. She continues even after he falls asleep though her hand slows, almost more of an idle petting, perhaps as much for herself as for him. This certainly wasn't where she envisioned spending the night.

She nods off a few times, though she fully wakens when he changes back. Brianna watches in a protective way, ready to help the transition if needed. It doesn't surprise her that he remains unconscious given how much energy he's expended and how draining changing forms can be, especially for the young ones. Once he's human again she visually checks him over, wanting to make sure everything's healed properly and as it should be.

When he wakes he'll find a blanket over him, as not long after he changed back she got the wolf on guard to bring her one. It wasn't without a bit of an argument but she wasn't about to leave Poe alone to grab one herself. She didn't trust someone not to try something and she also didn't want him to wake up alone.

Brianna's still nearby, tired but alert, her gaze pulled away from keeping watch to look at him as he stirs. She reaches out without thinking to stroke a hand over his hair and speaks quietly, keeping his new senses in mind. ]

Take it easy. You had a hell of a night.

[ he groans a little in reply to that, mostly because he can't imagine taking it anything but easy. her hand in his hair is nice — even though it almost immediately brings him back to the night before.

the memories are fractured in a way he can't completely process — more feeling than thought. (the most unsettling thing for him, the biggest thing he remembers, is the feeling of raw power. even trapped and caged, he'd felt the warmth of it. it was unsettling because he liked it.)

but parsing his way through those thoughts is too much work right now. most of his brain energy is being dedicated to ... wanting to go back to sleep, mostly. ]

Is it always like that?

[ if the past several hours have taught him anything, it's just how much he had literally no idea about when it came to weres. the order was bad and kidnapped people from the republic, he'd kill them for encroaching on their territory. black and white. simple. they weren't supposed to...... be nice to him. the fuck. ]

In the beginning it can be. [ She's honest, not wanting — or planning — to sugar-coat anything. At the very least he needs to know things, he should know, and there's no benefit to not being honest.

Would some of the others agree? She doesn't know and doesn't care. ]

Eventually it won't be. In time it gets easier, and you can gain more control over the change.

[ It's reluctantly that she draws her hand back, sensing the need for comfort in a way she hasn't really before, not on this level. But she also knows he's been through a lot and she'd be lying if she said there wasn't a part of her still a little weary, waiting for him to try and lash out or fight. ]

Once you feel up to it, I can take you out of here. You'll want more rest no doubt, but we need to get you some new clothes, and food.

[ Even she could feel starved after a shift so she can only imagine how hungry he might feel once he has an appetite. ]

[ "it gets easier" reassures him, even if he doesn't like it paired with "in time." he's still wrapping his head around this permanently being his life now.

also: he didn't realized how much he wanted -- needed -- comforting until she pulls her hand away. even if he did try to "do something", he'd be more likely to try to run away than fight. brianna earned that much from him. ]

I didn't think I'd get to go out.

[ so it's a relief to hear otherwise, even if he's not sure he wants to go out, considering all the friends in the order that he's made over time.

but then the mention of food reminds his body that a) food exists, and b) he will die if he doesn't eat in the immediate future. perish. cease to exist. getting mauled by fifty enemies for a single cheeto... it sounds worth it to him tbh.

he rolls to the side, experimenting with movement as a concept. nope, everything still hurts. it's probably manageable, though, as far as not lying down goes. if it brings him closer to food, it's absolutely manageable. ]

What kind of food?

[ At that Brianna can't help but crack a wry smile. ]

I don't think some of them thought you'd make it through the night.

[ She's ever watchful as he moves, almost like a parent might be with a child, which... is somewhat accurate, in a way. Not that the thought has crossed her mind yet. There hasn't been the time for her to really sit and think about what she's done and what that means going forward. Probably later that day or the next, after she's had a chance to decently rest or just has a bit of time to herself. ]

The normal kind. I hope you're not a vegetarian. [ It's just an idle comment, not a dig in any way.

Before she moves to get up herself Brianna uses a scrap of fabric from what had been his shirt to pick up the ring and necklace he'd tore off the night before, wrapping it in the fabric to keep from touching any bit of silver and tucking it in her pants pocket so it doesn't get left behind. She has no intention of keeping it from him, it's just easier — and safer — for her to carry it, and she starts to say as much when something catches her attention.

Her nose twitches and she looks toward where she knows the main door to be, tensing up for a moment. Company is coming. She's on her feet in an instant, moving to the cell door and unlocking it as quickly as she can. Standing in the doorway, Brianna looks back his way, wanting to tell him to hurry it up a bit.

Before she can there's a rumbling growl that definitely doesn't come from her. She doesn't tense but she's certainly not pleased when she turns to see the pack leader nearing.

An older balding male with an undeniably rough look, as much from his clothing as several visible scars, and the sort of gaze that near-always seems to be scheming. His eyes are dark, more wolf than human, and when he looks in the cell there's nothing kind in the partial smile that crosses his face. ]

"And how is the little hunter this morning?" [ There's a permanent growl that seems to back his voice, if not necessarily outright aggressive, though displeasure seeps in when he notices the lack of restraints. ] "He weaseled out of the restraints, did he?"

[ Those dark eyes land on her as the question comes and Brianna doesn't flinch; it's not the first time she's been on the end of that look. ]

A shift would be difficult if he remained bound.

"Yes, it would."

[ he didn't think he'd make it through the night, considering the blur of pain and heat that he remembers in between being bitten and turning. (never mind the turning itself.) it's only then, when he tries to remember what happened after being bitten, that he remembers the ring. his mother's ring. his heart aches thinking about how it's silver and he won't get to touch it again — ]

That's —

[ silver. only brianna's touching it. (with material. wow. wish he'd thought of that instead of being a dumbass. at least he didn't say anything out loud.) and keeping it safe for him? maybe. maybe she's taking it as something to hold over his head, if she assumes it's valuable to him. or maybe she intends to throw it into the ocean. none of that feels in line with what he's seen of her, though. he shouldn't trust her, but his new intrusive thought wolf brain cell is telling him that he can.

the sound (and scent?) of someone approaching makes him jerk upright, although he stays seated on the ground. something inside of him that doesn't even feel like part of him, something rough and raw and angry, flares in his chest. the little hunter. he wants to claw and scratch and bite this dude, even if the very tired and slightly horrified human part of him knows better, trying its best to hold back. ]

I'm fine, thanks!

[ he whittles his exterior down to sarcasm; it was be best he could do considering how much is raging beneath the surface. ]

[ Her eyes narrow slightly at the remark, unable to keep her own discontent off her face as much as she probably should. So the intent was indeed to try and make Poe suffer. It doesn't surprise her but it also makes her even less pleased with how she had more or less been used as a way to exact pain on someone who was their enemy.

Being ordered to fight was one thing. That's expected, at least, as an able-bodied member of the pack. Being strong-armed into turning someone was completely different. To her it was, even if there might be others in the pack who wouldn't see it that way. Who were all too happy to follow anything the pack leader instructed. ]

"Mouthy, I see." [ The pack leader looks at Poe with a slight snarl. ] "A few days spent in there and that attitude will dry right up."

[ Brianna tenses but swallows back the growl that wants to trickle out, her jaw set even before the pack leader turns back to her. ]

"Put the restraints back on him and get that stupid blanket out of there."

No. [ As he had already begun to turn away he clearly wasn't expecting any sort of defiance out of her but her simple reply has him quickly turning back, and she continues before he can get a word out. ] The hunter is one of us now.

[ The growl that her words earn is tinged with aggression and the pack leader steps into her space. ] "I gave you an order."

And I followed it. There was nothing about keeping him locked up after he turned.

"Watch your tongue, girl." [ The smack that comes with the growled words has her tasting blood as her head snaps to the side but she stands her ground, a low growl finally trickling out between her clenched teeth. ] "Don't forget your place. A cell can easily be found for you too."

[ as much as every single inch of him wants to fight, he stays still and keeps his mouth shut -- in no small part because of how brianna steps up for him.

poe still doesn't quite believe that she's protecting him; it goes against everything he knows. or thought he knew. what he expected was the treatment the leader was doling — and continuing to try and dole — out. this part of the whole capture experience was unsurprising.

he should just be quiet. he knows he should just be quiet and let them fight over his fate, but because he has a big stupid mouth that only ever gets him in trouble... ]

If you let me go, I'll get myself killed some way or another anyway.

[ it's not untrue? he's pretty sure there's not a single friend waiting for him in the outside world. (even if he did make it back to the republic, he wouldn't be able to stand the pitying looks. or being relegated to an outsider in practice if not in name.)

anyway: he didn't notice how raw and dry his throat felt until he tried to speak a long sentence. ow. ]

[ She's not able to get a comment out before Poe makes one and that doesn't help her discontent either. Not that it exactly surprised her that he couldn't stay quiet, he didn't really seem the sort, but she had hoped maybe he would be too tired and worn out to make a fuss. This would certainly be easier if he stayed quiet. Couldn't he see she was trying to help him not get killed? ]

You may find a cell but can you keep me in one is the better question. [ The low words come out as little more than a growl as she turns her own glare at the pack leader.

A few long moments pass as the two weres stare each other down, both tense for a fight. For her part, Brianna would rather avoid an actual fight, if only because of the potential consequences win or lose. The pack leader glances Poe's way, seeming to contemplate. ]

"Oh you won't survive long, hunters usually don't." [ A remark said with a flash of teeth, and that toothy cruel grin turns her way next. ]

"All right. You want to keep the little mutt around, so be it. But he's your responsibility. When he steps out of line, you both do. When he fucks up, I'll gladly take it out of your hide." [ Brianna snarls at him, remaining tense even as he takes a step back out of her space. ] "Your pedigree has gotten you this far but defiance comes with a price. Let's see if you're really willing to pay it."

[ As the pack leader turns and leaves she doesn't relax in the slightest, still braced for a fight and her gaze doesn't waver, watching the way one would warily watch any threat. She does finally bring a hand up to wipe at her mouth, spitting blood on the ground, and an unhappy growl rumbles in her chest. ]

[ all the fight leaves him as soon as the leader is gone. (he would have done better to be quiet, but he was mad and his brain cell was asleep.) he's brianna's responsibility, and the first thing he's going to do as her responsibility is... lay back down.

all right, all right, part of him may feel a little guilty. maybe that's why he's ready to absorb himself back into the blanket. ]

So, uh... Is there still gonna be food, or...

[ Brianna hears him but doesn't immediately respond, her attention trained forward in case any other company was forthcoming. Only once they seem to be alone does she slowly relax and finally glance over Poe's way, her irritation with the overall situation lingering. ]

Get up. Unless you want to stay in there.

[ She sighs and walks down the corridor a few paces, just making sure one of the others isn't hanging around to spy on her, and then walks back, fighting the urge to cross her arms. It's not his fault. (It might be a little his fault.) ]

Do you think you can keep your mouth shut once I take you out of here? I'm not keen to have to fight on an empty stomach. [ She arches a brow at him as she asks it. If he didn't have much self preservation that was going to be a problem, although one she supposed was better found out sooner than later. ]

[ he rocket launches himself up; soreness and shame can't deter him from the call of food. he immediately realizes that he does in fact have a little shame, and tries his best to make his torn up clothing from the night before Work for Him. if there's a werewolf stage where nudity in human mode becomes totally chill, he's not there yet. as long as he can make the shirt and pants work for him briefly, he will get through this. somehow. ]

Yeah, yeah, I'll be quiet. [ the dismissiveness (and mouthing off) is just hiding anxiety, let's be real. he's not coping especially well.

he wants to say "thanks for grabbing my ring," but the words get stuck in his mouth. it's too soft for the current moment. ]

[ She thinks about telling him to just use the blanket to cover up but after a moment of watching him wrestle with what's left of his clothing decides against it. It's probably better this way, really. Less implied kindness and the others can gain some satisfaction from the hunter being in a state, clearly brought down a few pegs on the ladder. And anything that might deter one of the others from verbally (or physically) poking at him is a good thing.

Selfishly, she's not exactly in a hurry to find out just how rough it's going to be having him around. ]

Good, because I'm sure I don't need to tell you that some of the pack will be eager for any excuse to start something with you.

[ Which wasn't exclusive to the fact of who and what he was, new wolves tended to have to deal with all kinds of shit by virtue of being low in the pack hierarchy, but it certainly wasn't going to do him any favors.

Would she have been any better than the rest of them had she not been directly involved in this? Brianna couldn't say, although more than likely she would have just avoided interaction entirely unless she'd been personally wronged. ]

Stay near, don't engage with anyone, and try not to get distracted by your new senses.

[ Brianna knows it's asking a lot but she can try to properly acclimate him later, once immediate needs are taken care of. With a last stern look she moves to leave the building, her focus split between keeping track of Poe and trying to suss out if anyone's loitering outside just waiting to cause trouble. ]

[ it's only then that it occurs to him that a) he has adjusted to the current level of sensory perception happening in his cell, and b) if he leaves it, he will get to experience a whole new range of things to see, hear, and smell. not so sure how that's going to go. time to redirect his efforts to breathe through his mouth. ]

If they don't start something with me, I won't start something with them.

[ in other words, "don't start none, won't be none." but there's no bite in his words. too tired and hungry to be anything besides talk. which is why, at least for the moment, he's staying close and being quiet as directed. ]

[ Those words earn a glance over her shoulder at him, eyes slightly narrowed, but she doesn't say anything. He doesn't actually sound feisty enough for that, thankfully, though she doesn't exactly appreciate it. Mostly it's her own tiredness of the situation. A situation that she's now gotten herself stuck with, good job self. Some tiny voice in the back of her head tries to comfort her with the thought that the kindness she's trying to give the hunter is something her mother would do, but she's not really in the mood to hear it.

Brianna's mildly relieved there's not a group waiting outside — having half expected it, especially after the pack leader's visit — and she doesn't spend any extra energy looking around to size things up. The path is clear and that's all that matters. Though she does have to consciously tell herself to keep her pace slower than she'd like to make sure that Poe keeps up with her.

If they can get to her home without incident, she'll call it a win. She lives alone (surprise, surprise) so it will be a fairly safe space for him. They just have to get there, and then she can get some food for the both of them. And figure out what to do about clothes for him. Probably lean on an acquaintance, bully them into it if she has to; being one of the stronger fighters in the pack came with a few perks, even if she didn't usually make use of any of them. ]

[ it really is a good thing that there's nobody around to provoke him. (or, more accurately, dunk on him. but whatever.) why? because the experience of being Outside is worse than he was bracing himself for. there are too many things to smell and hear. his eyes burn; it's too bright out.

he's 99% sure that this would not be nearly as bad after eating and maybe even getting real sleeping-as-a-person sleep, but that 1% of him is like "are you sure this isn't forever?" maybe he's one of the unlucky ones who can't make it through turning. (even though there's a part of him, if he reaches to feel it, that's resoundingly strong. that has to be the wolf, right? and it's not devouring him. he's made it this far.)

regardless, his brain isn't spending much time doing thinking. in the silence, his singular reason for living has returned to being food. ]

Is it much farther?

[ now we're pulling classics like "are we there yet." brianna will never regret this at all. ]

[ She has to restrain the urge to glance back at him a couple times as they walk. Sure, she can sense him trailing behind her but she's seen how distracted young wolves and new wolves can be. Furthermore considering his... history, there was nothing to say that him being unbalanced by his new heightened senses would keep him from doing anything hostile, or making some last-ditch effort to cause chaos and harm.

But there's also a thread of, well. Protectiveness. She's trying to ignore it, consciously and not, but it's there in the background all the same.

Her answer to his question is a low, irritated growl, and she spares the barest of glances at him. Asking childish questions didn't count as staying quiet.

And while no one was coming around to actively harass or poke at the new unwilling pup, Brianna can feel the attention here and there. Catches eyes turned their way, quiet comments being made. Annoying and bothersome to an extent but she can handle that; it's nothing she hasn't been dealing with since she joined up with the pack. It also doesn't make her relax. One, because to do so would be foolish and potentially invite trouble, and two, she knows it's only a matter of time before someone (or multiple someones) want to investigate the new wolf among them.

She only outright bristles once, when an overly curious member of the pack gets up from their resting place and makes to approach, clearly scenting the air and eyeing Poe. Brianna slows her pace and pointedly glares at them, giving a warning growl. The other pack member backs off after a few seconds staring at each other but she can already see the wheels turning. She sends up a silent prayer that any real trouble waits until the next day.

The rest of the walk transpires without incident. Her modest home is near the outskirts of the settlement, as unremarkable on the outside as most of the other buildings. It's essentially a one-bedroom with all the basics. The interior is simple but tidy; it gives the sense that someone lives there but doesn't necessarily spend a lot of time inside. Brianna locks the door behind them (more an emotional or symbolic comfort than it is likely to keep anyone out if they were intent on coming in) and heavily sighs, her shoulders finally relaxing and some of the tension leaving her body. Without a word she goes through an open doorway into the kitchen and, after grabbing a half-empty bottle of whiskey out of a cupboard and taking a long swig, she starts rifling around to gather things to start cooking. ]

[ joke’s on her, he already forgot he said he’d be quiet. his continued silence is only because he still feels like he was dragged through a meat grinder. but he doesn’t speak again.

that said, it’s good that she scares off the pack members trying to get a look at him, because something was already tearing up through his insides. a desire to attack, or at least also investigate. the thing buzzing beneath his skin is curious — but still too tired of be aggressive for aggression’s sake.

(if he lets his mind quiet enough to contemplate, he’ll have to accept that he really is one of them now. he has the same strengths and weaknesses. but it’s okay, because he’s not going to think right now. maybe he won’t think forever. he only has one brain cell, after all.)

once he’s in the apartment, he ends up… standing there and looking around awkwardly. should he sit? wait? just stand there vibing on colors and sounds? the last one is what he ends up doing, regardless. ]

What are you making? [ yep, that sure smells like alcohol, even without seeing it. whiskey? probably. ] Is that part of it or just for fun?

[ A good question, now that she's cooking for two. Which makes her realize she'll probably need to go get supplies sooner rather than later since she doesn't tend to have much extra on hand regardless. Or at least hunt a little extra in the coming days. Gods, she hopes he's a decent hunter. The idea of double work is immediately irritating.

The idea of all of this that she's now suddenly having to deal with is, well, more than irritating. She reaches for the bottle again. Not for the first time she has the fleeting thought that being cold-blooded and selfish would make her life so much easier in so many ways. ]

You saying you don't want a drink after the last however many hours? [ Brianna says over her shoulder, not raising her voice since there's no need to. It's not exactly an invitation but it's not not one either.

There's still a few venison steaks on hand from her last hunt so that's what she ends up going with, grabbing a carton of eggs out of the fridge as well. As hungry as she can be after a shift, and more so knowing just how much of an energy-drain it is, especially for a 'young' wolf, she's betting on making up more food than less. It's not as if she won't have need for the energy herself later, whether taking him out into the forest or if she has to forcibly get someone to back off.

A bit more rustling as she gets the necessary cookware out and then it's not long before things are sizzling on the stovetop and the tell-tale sounds of cooking fill the kitchen. ]

Never said that.

[ the more time he spends with all these exciting new stimuli, the easier it is to exist in the apartment feeling less whelmed. he's still sore and nauseous, so not completely sure if alcohol would make the situation better or worse... but not so unsure that he's not willing to try it out.

it doesn't matter as much once the smell of food starts permeating the kitchen. his single wolf brain cell is alive and it's screaming to eat. the idea of eating parks itself at the forefront of his mind, not leaving space for much else. ]

Thanks, for, uh... everything.

[ but especially food. ]

[ She doesn't stop what she's doing but Brianna does huff out a chuckle at his words. ] I don't know that I'd thank me, if I were in your shoes.

[ Mulling that thought over prompts her to continue talking. ]

It wasn't my idea, if that matters to you. Suppose it was my own fault for wanting to see what all the celebrating was about since I didn't join the fray yesterday. But if it wasn't me, it would have been someone else. [ That much had been clear to her. ] The others... probably would have been more interested in making you suffer.

[ When the first steak and few eggs are done she makes up a plate and brings it to the small dining table, glancing his way. ] Try not to make too much of a mess. [ Her tone is a bit dry but teasing. As an afterthought she grabs the carton of juice out of the fridge and puts it on the table as well with a glass, then returns to the stove to cook up another round, and some for herself. ]

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icon game on point as always

pffft pls 😊

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