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[ he doesn't reply right away. bb-8 is still alive, not reprogrammed. still himself. he saw it. he could see it on the screen. a small tremor of relief passes through him. he wanted the droid to be okay so much. bb-8 didn't deserve anything that was going to happen to him. he wouldn't understand it. and then he wouldn't be anything.

this is a game. it's all some kind of game to kylo ren. he knows it. he knows she expects him to say yes, and that he's going to walk into some kind of trap. it's going to be horrible. excruciating.

but he would regret it more if he didn't. ]

What do you want?

[ he uses this brief time when he has control over his limbs to wipe away the blood from his nose and mouth with his sleeve. and to obscure some of his emotions, maybe. ]

Edited 2018-06-06 21:40 (UTC)

I'm asking, not telling. [ A brow arches ever so slightly, expression otherwise unchanged. ] The droid doesn't have to be destroyed. We can simply take the data and leave the personality in tact. That's what you desire, yes? For your friend to remain as he is.

[ Kylo's actually not entirely opposed to doing as she proposes. The droid itself meant nothing to her; its only value was in its data and its relation to Poe. Releasing it held some use as well. By now the Resistance knew their star pilot was either dead or captured, the droid could confirm their fears. Kylo might even send a personal message with it.

If she did choose to release it. That all depended on Poe.

Feeling the shuttle move, she glances toward the front, speaking as she does so, her eyes shortly returning to him. ]

You have until we reach the Supremacy to decide. What would you give to see your droid released safely? What would you trade for its life?

[ anything.

the answer, of course, was anything. but he didn't want to actually say the word. to just hand over carte blanche for only maker knows what kind of torment.

that said, even if he tried, he wasn't able to parse it down to something less than anything. every attempt he made to draw a line was a failure, completely untrue. it was the same bottomless, selfless kind of love that parents felt for their children, he imagined.

he couldn't put a price on bb-8. wouldn't. in the end, how much was it going to matter what happened to himself, really? ]

Stop toying with me. You already know I'm gonna say anything, I know you do. You just want to hear me say it out loud. Fine. Anything. I'd do anything.

[ some of the intensity of his speech is ruined by how, now that he's speaking in more than clipped words, it's apparent that his possibly broken nose makes him sound congested. ]

[ Oh, I'm going to toy with you until you're well dead. she thinks to herself but doesn't voice or project.

She does purse her lips slightly, a touch amused. Such fervor in him. She'll have to be careful to not extinguish that fire, not until she tires of it, if she tires of it. After all, if she wanted someone easy to beat down she could take her pick from the stormtroopers or lesser officers, but that was only ever entertaining for a short while. ]

What I want is something specific. I can take anything. I want to know what you'll give.

[ It's a game, yes, but that doesn't mean she's not paying attention or his answers don't bear importance. In a way she's giving him a chance to pick his poison, so to speak. Not that she's certain he realizes that. ]

[ well, isn't that a new and exciting quandary he never wanted to be faced with. saying "anything" was easy. bracing himself for whatever horrible thing that might come his way was easy.

having to pick the weapon of his own destruction was less easy.

did he choose too much? if he chose too little, would bb-8 suffer consequences? he didn't want to. he didn't want to have to pick things like "make me go blind" or "make me forget all my friends." he couldn't even wire his brain to think that way. he didn't want to. all he knows is black and white. choosing the most drastic option at all times. (it was going to end this way anyway. maybe he could speed the process along.) ]

My life, then. Kill me. Just get it over with. You're gonna have all the information you need when you're done with BB-8. You don't actually need me for anything. Do it. Send him back to the Resistance so they can know what happened. It'll crush their spirits, just like you want.

[ Kylo huffs out a breath, lightly crossing her arms over her chest. His life, really? That was no fun. She wants to chide that he's not terribly good at playing this game but that would be showing more of her cards than she cared to. ]

You're the only one who wants it 'over with'. To be put out of your misery. [ Which she could do but again, no fun for her.

She narrows her eyes at him slightly but she's not really looking 'at' him, more browsing those surface emotions and fragments of thought. There's nothing particularly of interest to her and she blinks, eyes refocusing on him properly. His answer didn't satisfy her, however now that the idea to send the droid back with a message has been placed in her head she's warmed to it. Yes, that would make the most use of it, much more than outright destruction or reprogramming.

One thing he said does hold her attention though, and she gives voice to it as the shuttle lands on the Supremacy. ]

What makes you think the reason you're alive is so I can take information on the Resistance from you? Because you're right, the droid can supply much more detailed and concise information than your mind can.

[ he's not good at playing this game! what part of him says "poe dameron: torture expert extraordinaire"? his solution to his problems is blowing them up. right now he's just trying to blow up himself as a solution. it's not a good solution, but it's the one he's got.

his eyes shift around, confused. why else would she want him? he never took the time to think about anything else, when what was so obvious to him was just sitting there in plain sight.

you can almost actually see the gears turning. ]

The other thing. Morale. You want to crush their hope by taking out their best pilot.

[ She's surprisingly patient as she looks at him, watches him try to figure out her motivations. Ah, those simple-minded followers of the light. They can't see the trees for the forest sometimes. Kylo supposes she can't blame him. No doubt they were all trained to focus on the war, on the cause above all else. Not all that different from part of the conditioning process for the stormtroopers, really.

A brow arches when his reply comes. It's not wrong, but only a part of her reasoning. ]

Dealing a blow to morale is a good reason, I'll give you that.

[ The shuttle door opens and she lightly pats his cheek before standing. ] Don't hurt yourself thinking too hard. You'll figure it out sooner or later. [ Even if only because at a point there would be no pretense, no coy games. Just the two of them and her twisted, devious mind. ]

[ his confusion takes a hard left turn into anger. surprisingly, he doesn't like being talked down to like a child. but he also ... doesn't have any better ideas.

being left alone, unrestrained, he tries to release his pent-up anger in one of his favorite ways: trashing inanimate objects. but given that there's not really anything to trash, he settles for violently kicking the interrogation rack a few times before settling back down into wallowing. and trying to clean more blood off his face.

at least he saved bb-8. he could hold on to that. hope as fragile as a dandelion in a dust storm. but it meant something that he had it at all. ]

[ When Kylo steps off the shuttle there's a few officers and stormtroopers waiting for her command. The senior officer she instructs to monitor the progress being made with the droid, and to inform her when all the data was gathered. They wouldn't be destroying it after all, but sending it back to the Resistance with a little gift, a holo that she yet needed to record.

Actually, she would probably work on that while the troopers and one of the officers took her prisoner to one of the ship's medical bays, which is the next round of instructions she gives out. She wanted him tended to and patched up, a nice clean slate for her to work with. While there, she would have the staff complete a full work-up, in case there were any nasty medical secrets lurking beneath the surface. She didn't expect any, given his military position, but she wasn't going to trust whatever New Republic or Resistance records she could have dug up. Once done at medical, they were to bring Poe, restrained, to the throne room.

The sound of him letting out some of his frustration doesn't so much as cause her to pause in giving orders. But once she's done she turns, directing her voice back in Poe's direction. ]

Dameron... [ The Force is back in her voice, enough of it that calling his name will demand attention in a way near impossible for him to ignore. ] Get out here. Don't keep me waiting.

[ Once she can see him it's his turn to receive orders, as she keeps that same tone enhanced with her power. If he disliked obeying her little command on the shuttle, he would really hate this. ] You're going to go with these troopers to the med bay. You will behave yourself and answer any questions from the medical staff honestly. Am I understood?

[ he can feel her words pulling at him again, forcing him back into motion towards the place where he'd least like to be. any fight against her command is mental, the force pulling him along as easily and naturally as if he were in control of his own actions. he rushes out to meet her, even. actually rushes.

he knows what she's doing with the words before it actually sets in. first hearing, then feeling. go with the troopers to the med bay. behave. answer questions honestly.

as much as he tries to fight against it (by trying to run or cause a scene, anything he can think of that equates to some sort of struggle), he can't. the orders are locked in. he could misbehave just as easily as he could start walking on the ceiling. i.e., not at all. (that feeling when you're actually ella enchanted?) ]

Yes.

[ so much salt and bitterness contained inside a single word. ]

[ Kylo doesn't even try not to grin, borderline smirking as watching him obey fills her with smug contentment. Oh yes, this particular ability would see plenty of use. Part of her is already thinking ahead, wondering how far she can push him or how little of her power she can use before his willpower is able to overrule a command.

After all, even though he hadn't been able to keep her from what she wanted the first time she was in his mind, she certainly wouldn't call him weak-minded. Without aid of the Force, virtually everyone succumbed to such an ability in the end. Even with aid of the Force it couldn't always be resisted. Though she doubted that was knowledge he would take comfort in. ]

Good. [ The power leaves her voice, but not before that single word. She wants to see if the simple praise makes him uncomfortable. ] It's so nice to see that even the most rebellious can be brought to heel. [ That remark is for their audience, however after she steps in close, lowering her voice for only the two of them. It's tempting to touch him, just to cause that much more unease in him, but she refrains. ] Perhaps after I've broken you in a little I'll send whatever's left of the Resistance a holo showing them just what's become of their revered pilot.

[ She steps back and out of the way then, gesturing for all present to tend to their respective orders. There's plenty to be done but Kylo lingers, eyes following Poe just to make sure her orders had the desired effect. ]

[ the praise is like her trying to gently touch his face in verbal form — it feels good, but his mind is screaming that it shouldn't. that it's wrong.

and then color drains from his face. now that bb-8 is, as far as he knows, safe, he has nothing to hide behind. not bb-8, not the resistance. just the worry (worry? fear) for himself and his own fate. he tries to shove it down, tries to stay angry instead. if he holds on to that emotion, it's enough of a livewire that he won't need anything else. ]

You won't break me.

[ that's all he says before he's carted off, unable to do anything besides glance back at kylo with indignation one last time. ]

[ Before he can bury it she catches a flicker of that fear and oh, she wants to clutch at that thread and yank it to the forefront. To invoke the sort of fear that could paralyze even the strongest foe.

But Kylo resists the urge, keeps her power to herself, and lets him go. Even if part of her wants to project her voice in his mind simply to have the last word. Patience, she reminds herself. There's all the time in the world. All the time she sees fit to allow him. Which would likely end up being far more time than he would ever want, once he begins to see what she's capable of.

As she heads off to a conference room to record the holo for the Resistance, she can't recall the last time she was so excited to have someone to toy with. Most of the wayward or unlucky Resistance fighters that the First Order had captured in the past were scarcely worth her attention, their minds of little value and easily broken. One or two were mold-able enough to be sent to reconditioning, but the rest had simply been killed like the irritating pests they were. An officer trying to defect had probably been the last time Kylo rolled up her sleeves and really had an enjoyable time with the torture. It was important to soundly punish such traitors to make sure anyone else with the slightest of doubts stayed in line.

This was yet more personal. Through Poe she could strike at the very heart of the Resistance. Strike at the last remaining family she had, the wretch of a mother who somehow yet lived and refused to yield even when the odds were so clearly against them. She could strike at the traitor responsible for Poe slipping through her fingers the first time (though with Snoke around she wouldn't have been able to actually indulge herself, so in that respect it was almost an acceptable loss). And she could strike at the dirty little scavenger who threw away the chance at real power in favor of playing at being a hero. Kylo would see them all dead, eventually. She might even keep Poe alive to see such just to torture him that much more, assuming she didn't lose interest by then.

It doesn't take her long to record the message. Kylo keeps it short and to the point. She tells them that the First Order have all the information from the droid and the Resistance would soon have nowhere they could hide so they might as well give up and beg for her mercy. She informs them Poe is alive but firmly under her control, and she taunts them with the threat of reconditioning (okay, the threat is mostly to jab at FN-2187). Lastly, she calls out General Organa and reveals herself for who she once was. Call it long overdue payback for how she found out the truth about her grandfather, mixed with a hope of causing strife within the Resistance. Surely it wouldn't set well with many, knowing their leader's child is the one who has been hunting them down.

Once done, Kylo sends the message over to the Finalizer and watches on the video feed to make sure it's transferred to the droid and protected from being overwritten. Thanks to the droid itself they know precisely where to send it and a trusted squad are sent with the droid to make sure it gets to the proper location. As part of this act of mercy, the troops are only an escort and have explicit instructions not to engage.

After all of that she retires to her throne room to patiently wait, taking audience with assorted officers and staff in the meantime. She did have an army to attend to and a galaxy that was slowly but steadily coming under her rule. Best to get 'work' out of the way so no one tried to distract from her fun once her prisoner was ready. ]

[ meanwhile, med bay was a new and exciting journey of self-discovery. sure, it was nice to have his whole nose situation fixed and any other minor abrasions tended to, but he couldn't find any real relief in it. even if she didn't say she wanted a clean slate, he wasn't stupid enough to think that getting him healed up was a gesture done from genuine concern for his health.

the self-discovery part came in when he tried to push the limits against her orders. leaving him with the self-awareness to fight instead of blindly obey was probably a fun game on her part. he knew that, too.

so he experiments with it. tries to will himself to make a run for it, or to knock things in the med bay over. he tries to lie. but it doesn't work. the ideas don't make it past the "idea" stage; his body flat-out ignores him.

is this what a mental breakdown is like?

it's not even over something drastic. just a relatively minor, innocuous loss of control. but he hates it so much.

that's the mood when it's time to him to be dragged back to kylo ren. he hasn't had a facial expression that isn't some flavor of angry since he was taken prisoner, and he's not about to stop now. today stoic, silent anger is what's on the menu. he doesn't know what happened, not to bb-8 or to the resistance or with whatever message she had been planning on sending, but he could only hope that, if nothing else, at least bb-8 was okay. that is literally the only thing he's clinging on to right now. ]

[ She's in the midst of receiving a report on the latest system to fall to the First Order when they bring him in. Her eyes shift his direction for a moment but she doesn't cut short the officer's report, continuing to listen even if some of her attention is elsewhere. (Let's be honest, she hasn't been giving anyone her full attention because she's been too busy browsing her mental library of torture scenarios.)

After a few minutes more she dismisses the officer, having heard all she needs for the time being. Kylo beckons the troopers closer with Poe, relaxing against her dark throne, and a little smirk starts to curve her lips. ]

I trust all went without incident?

"Yes, Supreme Leader."

Wonderful. Just what I like to hear. [ Her gaze moves from the trooper who had spoken to Poe and she regards him quietly a moment before returning her eyes to the troopers. ] That will be all. You may return to your duties.

[ Kylo is quiet until they're left alone, the Knights by the door stepping out as well, and then all her attention focuses on Poe. ] Your anger is rather delectable, you know. We'll see how long it takes to dissolve into the fear that it hides. [ After a pause she decides to give him one small bit of solace, since he did attempt to play her earlier game in the shuttle. ] The droid is shortly to be on its way back to the Resistance. Unharmed, personality in tact. I do have to wonder though if it's capable of understanding that you attempted to barter your life for its.

[ 'Attempted' only because his life was forfeit as soon as he was captured. ]

[ he's okay. bb-8 is okay. he lets all that anger (and fear) wash away for a split second, replaces by relief. it's not long before the wave comes crashing back. but still. bb-8 is okay. ]

He's not — of course he would be. If he knew.

[ bb-8 was like a child. naive in some ways, but always curious. always clever. (sometimes too clever.)

but, he knew ... even if droids couldn't express emotions like grief, they could still feel them. the last time they saw each other, they were being carted off to their own separate gruesome ends. besides that, bb-8 would be able to look at whatever message kylo and the first order uploaded into him. he knew poe wasn't going to come back this time.

the thought of that made his heart hurt. but he'd rather his droid be hurting than wiped blank or broken into scrap metal. ]

[ A brow lifts at that brief lull she senses in his emotions. Part of her is almost sad that a droid of all things is what strikes his emotions the hardest, only because there was no torturing a droid. Not really, not like with organics. So even if the First Order again snatched up the droid, all it would be useful for would be to taunt him with. ]

The droid may know, or find out, in any case. [ She purposefully refers to his droid as a thing and not a person, like he is. ] I'm sending it back with a little message.

[ Changing the subject, she makes an idle gesture at the room around them. ] It's nice, isn't it? Suitable for a galactic ruler. Snoke favored nearly all blacks but I thought it needed more red. Just some splashes. Kind of like fresh blood on the polished floor. [ There's something about the way she says the last sentence that sounds like foreshadowing. ]

You'll become plenty familiar with this room, as with others. The torture room with all my toys isn't far. What you went through in interrogation before is nothing. Droids break, but I can keep going for hours. And I'm very, very creative. [ The smirk returns to her lips and she beckons him closer, reaching out through the Force to pull him toward the throne. And once he's close enough she reaches out with one hand to curl her fingers in his shirt and physically pull him right in front of her. Personal space? Nonexistent with her.

Her eyes run over his face as she speaks again. ] Earlier you said I wouldn't break you, but we both know that's a lie. I can break your mind and your body, and I can put you back together to do it all over again. If I want I can break you and mold you into the perfect little pet. Erase every thought about the Resistance and the war from your mind, take away everything you know until there's only me. How does that sound, Dameron? Obeying me because you want to. Doing any little thing I tell you to without question. Living to serve my every whim.

[ there's the fear again, crawling up his throat. he tries to push it down like before. keep with his anger. but it's harder and harder. the fear keeps growing, getting louder, leaving the anger to dissipate. building from the second she starts pulling him closer, reaching a kind of precipice when she's done speaking. and he's left hanging over the precipice, trying desperately to claw his way back up.

but he can't. he can't lie anymore — not because of the force, either. he can't lie to himself anymore. he knows he can't fight it. he's tried. tried and lost, as if there could have been any other outcome. ]

I'd rather die.

[ for someone who isn't actively suicidal, he keeps turning to death as the solution for his problems. but ... after so long, it keeps feeling more and more like it may be the only solution. the only way he can get out while still holding on to his sense of self.

his body isn't locked in place by the force, he realizes. he could struggle against her, run away. but to where? he'd never make it to a shuttle. he'd never make it out of this room. he felt paralyzed by something else. the same thing that's keeping his heart racing and his breathing shallow. it's that fear taking over, relenting to the knowledge that she's right. ]

Oh, I'm sure you would. I'm sure you'll beg me to kill you. [ She lets go of his shirt, hand smoothing the fabric back down. Deceptive softness, a gentle but firm caress, perhaps not all that different from how she might offer reward in the scenario she spoke of. ] Just like earlier I'm sure you'll try to tell me your life has no value and I should just throw it away. Let you have the mercy of death.

[ Humming a thoughtful noise, she tilts her head as she looks at him and lifts her hand to the side of his face. Almost daring him to brush off her touch, turn away, anything. She can taste the fear from him and it makes her eyes darken, thrilling and delighting her. ] You can't deny it now, can you? The truth that's hovered in the back of your mind from the moment your ship was caught. No one's coming to rescue you. No one's going to help you escape. No miracle is going to occur to free you.

You're mine, Dameron. I can, and will, do anything I want to you. Your life is mine and I will keep you alive as long as I care to, and there's nothing you can do to stop me.

[ Kylo smiles then. It's genuine but dark, the way a beast might smile before it devours the feast laid before it. And what a feast she has before her. ]

[ the worst part of all of it was knowing that she was right. she was right. every bit of it. he knew nobody was coming for him. they didn't have the manpower. they couldn't have rescued him the first time, let alone now, with so much of the resistance whittled away.

worse than that, was knowing that she was right in the sense that he was hers. he couldn't fight against it. nobody else could help him — except rey, maybe — and she certainly wasn't here right now. placing his eggs in that basket felt futile. there was no guarantee that she would come, or that it wouldn't be too late if she did. (he didn't like that thought. the thought of "too late."

what can he do? what's left? there are no big battles to be won here. as in, he can't leave. he can't take down kylo ren. any fighting, any noncompliance, has to be done on the micro level.

so he takes a chance. he reaches for her wrist to pull her hand away. ]

Don't touch me.

[ "don't touch me" was a sad argument in the face of "your life is mine," but it's all he has. it's all that he feels like he can control. ]

Why? Afraid the more I touch you, the more you'll learn to like it?

[ She lets him pull her hand from his face before she twists her wrist in his grasp, not to break it but to grab a wrist in turn. Her grip is only strong enough to hold on, more of a mirrored grip than anything else. A small way of not letting him have entirely what he wants for the moment. At least for the time being her other hand remains harmless resting on the arm of her throne. ]

You know, you could have tried to barter for that when trying to convince me to let your droid go. Well, more the opposite, really. You could have offered your body rather than your life. [ The remark comes as Kylo shifts her eyes away from his face to drag her gaze over the rest of him, not remotely trying to hide it. ] Although if we want to get technical you sort of did by first offering anything.

[ his mouth gapes open as he tries to find the best words (or any words) to reply with, but nothing comes out. he's just standing there silent, mouth hanging open in a disgusted expression while she holds his wrist.

the truth was, he hadn't considered it as an option because he wasn't really interested in women that way. it hadn't even registered as a blip on his radar.

he pulls his wrist back (or tries to), expression settling down into his usual baseline of contempt. ]

Sorry, not interested.

[ The fact that catches him off-guard both does and doesn't surprise her. It's far from the first time she's seen such a reaction in a man. Amazing how prowess in the Force or on the field of battle they might scarcely blink at, but turn that to matters more intimate, to behavior more typically thought of as masculine, and suddenly they were shocked and appalled. Kylo's in a good enough mood to not have it grate on her nerves -- which most certainly is to Poe's benefit, even he might not consider anything to be at present.

Her lips press together in another smirk, a brow arching at the expression on his face. It's almost cute, really. A trace of innocence soon to wither and die. ]

As if that even slightly matters. Particularly at this point in time.

[ When he tries to pull out of her grasp she only tightens her grip, giving a slight tug in return to keep him close. Kylo shifts her position in the throne, sitting more properly with feet flat on the ground, legs parting so he stands between them, taking away another small bit of space that remains between them. She leans forward, purposely putting herself almost nose-to-nose with him to make him uncomfortable, her dark eyes on his. ]

Protest all you like, it's not going to help in that any more than when it comes time for me to sink a blade into you. What bothers you? The worry that I might be right about that too? That you might learn to crave me, need me? Sounds like a fun experiment. To see how long it takes before no means yes without my powers swaying your mind.

Of course, I think I've already proved I can make your body obey me without affecting what you really think... [ Her other hand moves then, splaying upon his stomach, and there's something almost threatening about what could otherwise be a relatively innocent motion. ]

[ he didn't think it would matter, not really, but he figured he'd try to deflect.

either way, she succeeds in making him uncomfortable. she's so close, too close. and she has his wrist, so he can't move back. he can't even imagine what she's talking about. needing her. impossible. every cell in his body wants to revolt against it. even her hand pressed against his stomach makes him want to recoil. he doesn't, but he wants to. his insides do. ]

C'mon, stop.

[ his witty retorts take a steep decline in quality. they aren't working. it's a game he can't win. telling her to sink the blade in wouldn't get him his way. that's the only other alternative his mind can come up with. and "stop" certainly isn't going to actually get her to stop, but it's all that comes out. it's the fear bubbling its way up to the surface. ]

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pretends i shouldn't be running out the door to work in minutes :x

👌