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WISH LIST

★ my dark au kink:
+ being captured by the first order and subjected to reconditioning
+ trying to turn him back with the power of gay love and friendship (and possibly failing)
+ he was always a first order tie fighter pilot instead of winter soldiered
+ poe and finn first order murder squad (dynamics if they were both stormtroopers? running away together?)
+ ^ part b: the fam that gets captured and reconditioned together… stays…together…
+ Interesting Dynamics with kylo and hux from dark aus

★ finn stuff
+ what will they do after the war? romantic vacations? homesteading? sending finn's spit to space 23andme?
+ infinite escape reimagining/aus, stormpilot escape room reigning champions

★ rey stuff
+ relationship of convenience because they're both In Denial
+ sith princess rey aus where he tries to save her and/or she turns him

★ kylo stuff
+ infinite interrogating/torture room reimagining/aus
+ ^ part b: stockholm syndrome?
+ We Need to Talk about Leia

★ general
+ honestly anything regarding leia (esp processing grief post-tros)
+ talking about his sketchy spice runner past (possibly playing things taking place during that time in his life?)
+ ^ same for things taking place during academy/new republic tbh
+ i love aus. modern aus, vampire aus, a/b/o aus, let's au the entire world
+ i prefer m/m for poe but am good with most ships

kinks if ya nasty

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ She stands there, waiting. There's no need to use the Force to predict his reaction. She's seen enough of him to know he won't go down without a fight. That he can't not take the bait. Although was it really bait when her opponent was so clearly and drastically at a disadvantage?

Only once he pulls the trigger does she move. The distinctive sound of the lightsaber fills the air, painting red as she deflects the blaster shot. Not toward him but off harmlessly into the ground. It's not so much a reflection of Kylo not wanting him harmed as it is her wanting to cause the harm directly. ]

Is that all you've got?

[ Lowering her saber, she waits a breath or two, anticipating another shot.

And then she lifts her free hand and uses her power to hold him still and force the aim of his blaster toward the ground. It wasn't a fair fight but there really was no way it could be. Perhaps if Rey were there to have Poe's back then he might have stood a chance. But Kylo had gone to great lengths to make sure the defiant Jedi wouldn't get in her way with this. ]

[ he thinks of what he could've done. he could've tried to get multiple shots in. he had that opportunity and he squandered it, though, because as soon as he's thinking about it, he's no longer in control of his own body. the blaster is pointed at the ground.

he scowls at her, simply because that's the only thing left that he can do. ]

Unfreeze me and you'll find out.

[ don't ask what his plan after that is, because he doesn't have one. ]

[ A brow arches at his scowl. It doesn't bother her; she knows she'll be seeing plenty of it.

Kylo approaches with purposeful strides, turning off and sheathing her lightsaber. As she nears she can feel his hate, practically tangible in the air between them. It puts a private little smile on her face, pleased that she'd affected him so deeply. She's looking forward to sinking her power into his mind again and taking a leisurely stroll through all the things he'd love to keep from her.

Once close enough she reaches out and simply takes the blaster away from him, tossing it harmlessly out of reach. Her eyes drift over Poe in search of other weapons as she takes a slow walk around him. ]

So defiant. You really are the poster child for the Resistance.

[ When she stops in front of him she's in his personal space, a wordless example of her dominance over the situation. ]

It's going to be so satisfying when you break. And you will. You'll bow to me and beg for mercy, and I will take from you whatever I want.

No traitorous stormtrooper is going to save you this time. No one is going to save you.

[ there are no other weapons on him, which speaks multitudes to his complete lack of backup plan.

things that he would have taken pride in hearing from anyone else offend him in the context of coming out of kylo ren's mouth. poster child of the resistance. best pilot in the resistance. they aren't compliments so much as taunts. if he could move away, there's no doubt that he would have by now. instead, he's glued down while she's in his personal space. and hating it.

traitorous stormtrooper. finn. finn was part of the team that came out to the trading post. what was going to happen to finn? he tries to push the thought down, away from where kylo ren could grab at it like low-hanging fruit. but the concern clings to him all the same. ]

You won't find anything good to take.

[ if he said the words, maybe he could believe them. ]

[ At that she chuckles, the sound low and dark, matching the way the lingering smile twists on her lips. It's not lost on her that that's the part of her statement he chooses to argue, even if it might have been a subconscious choice on his part. ]

Oh, I think I will. Someone like you? There's plenty for me to take.

[ Her expression shifts as she picks up on the concern emanating from him. Kylo tilts her head and raises her hand in a familiar gesture, just skimming the surface, and -- there. ]

The traitor is here? That's interesting. I'll have to strike him down with more force next time. [ She's aware of Finn having been on the Supremacy -- and escaping (seriously, the First Order had become horrible at holding on to prisoners, it's no wonder they'd been unable to recapture Poe) -- but she knows that won't get half as much of a reaction as bringing up when she nearly killed Finn.

Kylo takes a step back and looks toward where the fight, or what's left of it anyhow, is taking place. If she had to guess the locals were losing, but she'd never been interested in which side would come out on top. The desire to finish off the traitor once and for all does flare up, however, she tempers it and keeps her focus on her sole objective.

When she reaches down to her belt it's not for her saber this time but for her communicator. ] Bring the ship around. I have what I came for. [ It's another small, purposeful statement from her. She wants Poe to know he's the reason for all of this. That whatever is happening to his team is collateral damage and he is the mission, not taking out a handful of the Resistance. ]

[ every muscle in him tenses from just the slight brush at his thoughts — it was hard not to expect more, not to expect it getting worse. and, of course, there was the fact that she found exactly what he would have preferred to keep to himself.

as usual, his feelings betray him more than just his thoughts ever could. anger wells up inside him, how could she just talk about finn like that? like what she did to him was nothing, and she'd do it again? he wants to do more, to channel all that anger against her in some way, but all he can do is clench his jaw and stay angrily frozen in place.

it's compiled with her comm message. what she came for? for him? blood was being spilled because of him — and not out of some order he'd given for some cause he could justify, but because taking him had been a first order mission?

he tries to stay calm in the face of this. by ... well, being himself. ]

If you just wanted me, you didn't have to go to all that trouble. I would've taken an invitation, maybe some flowers …

I would say I'll remember that for next time, but I won't have need to track you down again.

[ Namely because she didn't intend to release him from her clutches. The blame for his escape lay fully within the First Order, so Kylo would make sure they couldn't make such a blunder again.

She doesn't turn as the familiar shuttle lands behind her, wanting to keep her gaze toward where the fighting is taking place in the event that any of the Resistance fighters take notice of what's going on. When the ramp lowers it's not stormtroopers that disembark but two Knights of Ren. ]

Time to go, Dameron. Say goodbye to your precious Resistance because you're not going to see them again.

[ Kylo steps close to him again, lifting her hand and with a slight gesture of her fingers bids unconsciousness to wash over him. One of the Knights will keep him from hitting the ground, the other watching their backs as they board the shuttle. ]

[ if he could move, he would have looked back in lieu of "saying goodbye". if only to see if he could see finn one last time. (gay.)

as it is, she may be looking at the resistance, but his fixed position leaves no other option than for him to stare at the shuttle ... but it's not stormtroopers who come out. he'd been expecting stormtroopers. some kind of repeat of last time. who are these guys? he has so many questions.

but before he can think of further questions, he's not thinking of anything. he's out cold and falling into some knight's arms. great. his life is going great. ]

[ When the shuttle arrives back on the Finalizer, a collection of officers are there to greet them, Hux included. And oh, was it ever satisfying to watch his expression go from being on the verge of criticism for her extended absence from the fleet to surprise when her Knights carry Poe off the ship. ]

That's right, General. I did what you could not. [ She doesn't even try not to be smug about it. ] Don't question my methods again.

"Of course, Supreme Leader."

[ Kylo picks up on jealousy as she passes Hux and makes note of it. It's not the first time she's felt it from him but this is different. There's a violent, angry edge to the emotion, and she doesn't believe it's directed at her. Kylo's gaze shifts to her Knights as they take Poe off to the interrogation room. If Hux thought he was going to get his filthy hands on her prisoner he was sorely mistaken.

An hour or so passes before she's able to make her way to the interrogation room. A stormtrooper might be in the corridor guarding the door but it's two of the Knights that are inside keeping watch over the prisoner. The Knights were loyal to her before Snoke's death and completely so after -- which was more than she could say for most on the ship. Loyalty out of fear or duty wasn't the same. ]

Is this bringing back memories? [ She taunts Poe lightly, leisurely approaching where he's restrained. ]

[ he wakes up and ... can he really be surprised? no. from the second he realized he was going to be taken prisoner again, he had a feeling that this was where he'd end up. all that's missing is stormtroopers. he's left wondering about that detail.

any and all potential wondering is shoved to the side, though. the moment she approaches is the moment his adrenaline starts rushing. fight or flight is in full-effect. he can hear his pulse in his ears. he's bracing for more torture. was that it? maybe not more torture so much as having his mind violated again. that was what really filled him with dread. ]

Not any good ones. All this time and you still haven't gotten around to upgrading?

[ to say no would be lying, but he doesn't want to give her the satisfaction of simply saying yes. ]

A shame. They're quite fond for me.

[ Oddly enough, not because of the torture itself. No, most of the enjoyment had come from retrieving what the First Order itself could not. Where they failed despite all their efforts at breaking the pilot, she had triumphed. Perhaps not at breaking him but that hadn't expressly been the goal. Finding out what he did with the map trumped all else. Properly breaking him would have come after, if not for his escape. ]

Upgrades? Oh, there are plenty on my flagship, but unfortunately it's still being repaired after your Resistance's attempt to destroy it. A creative attempt, I'll give you that, but only able to be performed once. [ Kylo almost wished she could have seen it, but she'd been a little occupied at the time. ] You'll get to see that ship soon enough.

[ It was simply easier to do the initial interrogation here than over on the Supremacy while it was mildly chaotic with construction. Something she was eager to have complete so she could leave the Finalizer to Hux and his glowering. All that had been Snoke's was now hers, which included the fleet's flagship, and she wasn't about to let Hux get any ideas about trying to claim it. Even if every time she walked into the throne room her mind was assaulted by memories.

Kylo stops to stand next to Poe, her eyes running over his face as she gets a sense of his present emotional state. ]

Has it haunted you, the last time you were here? You were so brave in the face of the First Order's droids, but not so much when you couldn't scream your way out of giving up the map and the location of your droid. It's all right, you don't have to pretend to be brave now. We both know that you'll give me anything I want.

[ he's got a quip right on the tip of his tongue (something along the lines of "they would be"), but she keeps talking. so much talking.

and while she's talking, he clenches his jaw, trying to keep more things he has to say inside. he was the one who programmed the coordinates in after he mutinied. trying to jump to hyperspace through the finalizer had been his last ditch plan. meant to only be performed once. what would kylo think if she knew that? well, she'd probably find out in a minute or two, the way things were going. ]

I'm not giving you anything.

[ give was not the right word. she could take, and he knew that she would. he was filled with cold dread — because she wasn't wrong, it haunted him, and she had to know that. she was just throwing it in his face now. taunting him with the fact that it didn't matter, because she would take whatever she wanted clean out of him.

but he refused to give her anything willingly. ]

[ She smirks, and there's something decidedly dark -- sinister, even -- in her expression. Leaning in, she speaks low near his ear. ]

I can make you.

Surely you don't think the only thing I can do inside your mind is simply draw information out? There's so much more that can be done. I can see everything, even what you hide from yourself. I can reach in and take, yes, but I can create as well. I can make you want to tell me anything I ask. Do anything I command. I can make you forget the Resistance ever existed.

[ Kylo closes her eyes to soak in the emotion coming off him in waves. This was what she hadn't had time to enjoy the first time they did this dance.

Straightening, she brings a hand up to let her power brush against his mind. Where to begin? ]

Let's get down to business, shall we? The sooner you give me the current location of the Resistance, the sooner this will all be over.

[ his entire body stiffens as she whispers to him, the words sending a distinct shiver of discomfort down his spine. he'd been so focused on his fear of what had been done to him the first time, he hadn't stopped to consider the other options. subtle manipulation, not just using mind-reading as a destructive blunt instrument.

he's already bracing himself for more when he can feel her power seeping into his mind, a light touch but still present. any second now, it'll get worse. everything will be pain and ripping. he just knows it.

maybe she was right that she could do all those things to him, but he wasn't going to make it easy for her. he doesn't even dignify her words with a response. his expression shifts into an angry scowl and stays that way. ]

What, no snappy words of defiance this time?

[ Not that it makes a difference, but it's just one more little detail that tells her what state he's in. She can feel the way he braces and tries to prepare for what's to come. A noble effort, to be sure. One that makes her want to toy with him a little and draw out the anticipation.

She slowly increases the pressure of her power in his mind and begins to cast aside the surface thoughts that bear no relevance to what she's after. Her power seeks out the places she cut into before, wanting to examine those mental scars and see how well he's managed to recover from them. Soon enough those wounds will be raw again, easily manipulated by her hand. ]

Where is the Resistance currently hiding? I know there can't be many of you.

[ Her eyes narrow slightly, gaze intense with her focus as she at last brings what he's been expecting. The pressure shifts, still there but sinking in now. Digging in and ripping open those scars. She knows he'll try to bury it deep, to try and keep her from the information as long as he can, but that only makes her more intent on pulling it out of his mind. ]

[ he tries to be strong, but she can see the echoes of what she'd done to him on the finalizer still present in him. in ways he would never tell anyone. he puts on a brave front because he wants to be okay. the resistance needs him to be okay. but his sleep is fractured and restless, punctuated with waking up in cold sweats. he couldn't stop thinking about it, the way she'd dug into his mind like it was nothing.

and it was happening again. even before she starts digging deep, the panic rises in him. he tries to stop her in whatever minor way he can, tries to divert her with thoughts of something else, literally anything else. home. other planets he'd been on. space. vastness of space.

it's rushed. sloppy. of course, he never stood a chance, but at least he could say he tried. he put on a brave face. the brave face gave way to guttural screaming, but at least it had been there at all.

at the end of the cat and mouse game, when his will finally relents, she gets the information she's looking for. defiant core. a base in the triton system made from salvaged parts of an old light destroyer. being a pilot, he held a certain fondness for it. the fact that they'd found a squadron of ancient y-wings there helped with that, too. sure, they were rust buckets, but it was still something the resistance could work with. ]

[ Kylo relishes in it. The panic and fear. The way he tries to throw up diversions and slow her down in any way he can manage. The way the first time she dug into his mind clings to him, that knowledge making this time even worse.

There was power in fear and pain, and she wields both with the ease of her saber. The darkest part of her would say it was simply natural given her heritage.

Finally she latches on to the knowledge she's after. The location is unexpected and explains to her why the First Order was having such difficulty in finding them. A reprieve comes then as she withdraws her power, hand dropping to her side. She walks to the door and sends one of the Knights to inform General Hux of the Resistance's location and give him the go-ahead to rally the fleet for battle. This time she would let victory or defeat rest on the General's shoulders, as either outcome gave her leverage and would keep him off her back for a short while.

Returning to Poe, there's no pretense this time as she lifts her hand and sends her power back into his mind. ]

Let's see just how many are left to kill. The traitors you're so desperate to protect. [ She knows of a few that remain. FN-2187. Chewie. Rey. Her brow furrows slightly against a slight stirring of emotion within her and she sets her jaw, curling her fingers to dig her power in deeper, taking out her discontent at herself on Poe. It didn't matter who was left. They refused to bow to the First Order and thus they had to die. ]

[ he can't even feel relief when she retreats from his mind, because a: he let the resistance down again (despite the knowledge that almost anybody else would have been just as unable to fight as he was) and b: kylo was immediately giving that information to hux. whatever brief shreds of security and secrecy they'd had were gone now.

seeing it coming and knowing how it would feel did just as much the third time as it had the second time — nothing. in fact, it made it worse. ]

You won't. You won't kill them.

[ if he said the words, he could will them into reality. maybe they stood a chance; they had rey. he could pin all his hopes and dreams onto rey. it was better than the other option, which was accepting that they stood no chance at all.

the numbers were bad. after the transportation to the raddus, he knew there were about 400 resistance members left. whittling that number down after the people they lost since then, after people they kept losing ... it was a little more than 100. maybe. of them, the "people he's so desperate to protect" are going to be at the forefront of his mind, obviously. his droid, who counts as a person to him for some reason. the person who saved his life who he was harboring some kind of unrequited crush on (finn). the last jedi (rey). the remainder of his squadron (jess pava and snap wexley). people who were in the resistance, who were simply his friends (c'ai threnalli and kaydel connix).

and then, of course, there was leia. the hero worship that bordered on unhealthy. the way he basically saw her as a second mother. he was willing to do anything for her, to protect her vision of the resistance. even if there came a time when no one else believed, she would still have him. he tries hardest to shove that one down, desperate to protect her. desperate to protect her and feeling ashamed that he had failed her. again. and, unlike last time, he wasn't so sure he'd get a chance to come back and apologize. ]

[ She doesn't bother with a verbal reply to his protest. The only reply that comes is in the form of her power shoving him hard against the interrogation rack (idk? torture rack doesn't sound right so *wings it*) and an increasing pulse of pain from her power in his mind. They were going to die. All the remaining Resistance would be killed, exterminated, and there would be no one left standing in the way of the First Order exerting its dominance across the galaxy. They would succeed where the Empire ultimately failed and she would see finished what her grandfather began so many years before.

Relentlessly tearing into Poe's mind to get at what she wants to know, she stays focused as she takes note of the roster his mind presents her with. She even manages not to react at the thought of Rey. But... who was he trying to hide? Kylo's brow furrows and she takes a step closer, increasing the strength of her power. It's a brief chase, her power surging forward to try and catch up to the pocket of thoughts he's pouring so much energy into keeping from her.

When she gets it in her grasp she feels a surge of victory -- only to immediately have it snuffed out by the content of his thoughts.

What... This didn't make any sense. The dead need no protection, why would he fight so hard to keep this from her? Unless... unless...

Kylo staggers back, her power and presence leaving Poe's mind abruptly. She's staring at him wide-eyed and pale but she's not really seeing him. It can't be possible. She felt it. Leia's presence had caused her to hesitate and then the loss of that presence when one of the other fighters took the shot she couldn't... Kylo would never forget that twist of anguish inside her. Or how the part of her she tried so hard to deny existing wished she had done something to stop it from happening. ]

Leia's alive?

[ It can't be true. And yet, it has to be true. His thoughts couldn't lie to her and she felt the strong, genuine emotions tied to those thoughts. Her mother is still alive. Kylo's so shocked she isn't sure what she should feel or which emotions to fight against. ]

[ being slammed against the torture/interrogation rack doesn't even really register as a thing that's happening to him, since he's so busy living through his own personal hell. any physical pain is just a blip of an afterthought.

the abrupt pull from his mind leaves him panting for breath, eyes coming into focus to see kylo's shock and feeling ... well, not happy. not satisfied. those feelings were out of the reach of his current emotional spectrum. but it would be wrong to say that he didn't feel some kind of small, vicious pleasure in catching her off-guard. ]

She's alive. No thanks to any of you.

[ it was hard, if not impossible, to forget the feeling of dread when they weren't sure if she'd make it. letting finn and rose sneak onto the supremacy alone, because he wanted to make sure someone would be there when she woke up. it wasn't even so much that if the resistance was stripped away, she would have him — without han, without luke, without brianna ... he wanted to be the person who would be there for her, if no one else was left.

but she made it. she was alive, for however much longer.

how does he read kylo's reaction to this news, though? had she ... maybe the first order thought the remains of the resistance were sitting ducks without her and her leadership. ]

Why? Does that scare you?

[ Were she in a right state of mind Kylo would have acted out or snapped back -- I could have killed her but I didn't. -- but honestly everything's a whirlwind. Kylo had been privately grieving for weeks and truthfully it had been part of why she let Hux primarily lead the search for the Resistance after what happened on Crait. The conflict in her that was supposed to have died at times never seemed louder. She was the last of her line -- admittedly most by her own doing -- and the ache of loneliness that came with it had been unexpected.

But now it seemed that was all irrelevant.

The confirmation that Leia was, in fact, alive repeats in Kylo's mind and emotion twists her insides to the point it almost feels difficult to breathe. Her mother is alive and she feels... relief. There's a surge of something bright and hot inside her and oh, that part of her that was supposed to die with Han wasn't dead at all. She buried it well, but with this news there's no way to keep it back. Not until she gets herself back under control.

Kylo blinks past the wetness in her eyes and she closes the distance between them in a breath. One hand grabs a hold of Poe's shirt, pulling him toward her. Force powers seem to be completely forgotten about in the moment. ]

How did she survive? I felt her die that day. [ There's a certain desperation and eagerness in her voice now that was very unbecoming for a Supreme Leader, but entirely appropriate for a daughter who'd thought she lost the last bit of family she had. Kylo feels... hope? No, that couldn't be it. And even if it was, what right did she have to feel such things now after all she had done. ]

[ his expression shifts into one of confusion as kylo starts crying? being grabbed at doesn't feel real. this entire scenario, where kylo seems not only emotional but some kind of pained about leia organa doesn't feel like a thing that could really happen. maybe he's hallucinating the whole thing. ]

She — [ should he even give this information? it didn't matter, he guessed. it wasn't sensitive. kylo could pull it out of him if she really wanted to. and maybe it said something about leia. that there was something just as legendary about her as there had been about luke skywalker. ]

Maybe she did, for a second. But she made it back to the ship. It was like — like she flew through space.

[ For perhaps the first time in who knows how long, the thought that she could simply take what she needs to know isn't in her mind. She needs information on her mother. She's not going to take that. It would feel wrong. ]

She... she flew? [ Her brow furrows for a moment, and then her expression shifts toward realization. ] The Force protected her. It must have. The only way anyone could survive space without protection is through the Force.

[ Kylo's gaze shifts away from Poe as she mulls it over, and a small, soft smile comes to her lips. Yes, that had to be it. With how strong the Force was in their family it only made sense that Leia might be some level of Force-sensitive, and that the Force would be there when she needed it the most. That Kylo hadn't felt her mother's revival could easily be chalked up to Snoke's interference, or the Force itself hiding Leia's presence from her. It didn't matter. None of the details mattered. Her mother was alive and she might get to see her again.

Except you just passed along her exact location and ordered an attack.

And like that a shadow passes over Kylo, the smile dying and any visible signs of relief turning to concern. She lets go of Poe and half turns to look to the closed door. Did she try to stop the attack? No, she couldn't. That would raise far too many questions. But she had to do something... didn't she? Should she?

Did she care now? Was that a thing she was letting herself do?

Rubbing a hand over her face, Kylo begins to pace, trying to sort out her options. The interrogation completely forgotten. There was no information that could possibly be half as important as what Poe had just told her. ]

[ he still doesn't feel like any of this is real. kylo's reaction to leia being alive — she was happy? and then the turning towards the door. abruptly forgetting him. leaving him discarded. instead of feeling any kind of relief about getting a longer reprieve from torture than anticipated, it made him tense. worried. concerned for leia. ]

Why do you care?

[ he tries to put some anger behind it, but he's truly, sincerely curious.

his next instinct is to follow up his question with something else, to say that leia would live through whatever they tried to do to her next, because she had the force and was therefore invincible. but he couldn't even invite the possibility of something happening to her into the conversation, like saying the words might will it into reality. ]

Why wouldn't I care?

[ She snaps, turning back to look at him. As if the answer should be obvious.

And then there's a second wave of realization, sharply bitter.

Perhaps it's not obvious because Leia didn't tell anyone what happened to her daughter. That made sense, didn't it? Surely the truth would be embarrassing and shameful to the driving force behind the Resistance. Distantly, Kylo recalls Han saying they wanted her back. But it wasn't as if her father was known for being the most truthful. It didn't matter that she hadn't felt lies then as doubt was present in her mind now. ]

It doesn't matter.

[ Kylo has to force the lie out, her throat tight as all that relief starts shifting to hurt.

The door to the room opens as the other Knight returns and she feels a pang of dread. It was done, then. The fleet was in motion and it would be pointless to stop what she put in motion before she knew all the facts. Not that it made that big a difference, the rest of the Resistance could die for all she cared -- maybe not Rey? she was undecided on that count -- but her mother... perhaps she could put a capture-only order out? No, Hux would see through that. 'Accidentally' make sure something happened to Leia.

She would have to leave it to fate. ]

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ngl been eagerly waiting for this reply

yesssss

we interrupt your regularly scheduled torture session for a small feels trip

😭

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